Monday, August 30, 2004

My mojo's back!

"The trouble with born-again Christians is that they are an even bigger pain the second time around."
--Herb Caen

Don't get me wrong, I'm not an atheist. I'm a good little Catholic girl (learned to drink and gamble with the best of them). BUT I'm a little tired of hypocritical holier-than-thou-while-I'm-actually-a-snake-when-I-think-no-one's looking crap I'm having to put up with on an almost daily basis. Don't want to go into too much detail there, but I'll just call him Preacher-Man for now. We've crossed the line from slightly unethical to downright NOT right. I just shake my head and get out of the way.

Signs that my myteriously-GONE mojo is back......

#1--> My hair was Fabulous today. Nowhere to go, no one to see, but the hair was workin' again.

#2--> Got pulled over by the KS Highway patrol and did NOT get a ticket. Didn't even try to get out of it, just thank God for large black men who like Sinatra and a sassy sense of humor. There can't be too many of them out there, and I'm lucky to be pulled over by one. I was stuck in the construction traffic on I435....lots of cones, no activity WHATSOEVER...and after waiting an eternity, when it opened up, one foot past the last cone I hit the gas, slipped to the far left lane and boogied. Almost got blown off the road by a woman I swear was 90 yrs old --couldn't see much but the top of her head as she BLEW past half-way in MY lane. Cruised on I35, got pulled over by the really tall officer. I asked him, "are you sure you can pull me over here? Is this your jurisdiction?" And he responded "is this a Kansas Highway you're on?" guess that answered that. I also asked why he didn't pull over the grandma that went flying by and he said because he liked my music better. I laughed at him and asked, "then what was I listening to?" and he said "sinatra". He also said he couldn't have known what I was cruising along to if I didn't have every window open and the music up and wasn't I hot in the 85 degree sun? I told him, no, because I also had the air conditioning on. He rolled his eyes and went back to see if I was an axe-murderer with a warrant out for my arrest. I must have passed muster as he gave me a paper to sign but NOT a ticket. woo hoo...

#3--> Had a young thing come on to me in the grocery store at 10pm tonight. It's been so freaking long since I've been flirting anywhere that it took me a while to figure out this cute little guy was following me in the grocery store. He asked some question about the organic section of the store (we have a sad little shelf, not a section at the local Price Chopper), then later at the milk dept. he opened the door for me and scooted my basket over for me to put the milk into. I smiled, then figured out, OH... Then at checkout time he ended up right behind me asking which school I go to...he's home for the weekend from KU law school. I said, oh honey, I'm old old old but thanks for making me feel young again. On the way to my car I thought what the heck, then figured great hair, mojo back, AND the little case of teenage acne zits on my chin must have really worked together to give me the "young" look. Who needs wrinkle cream to look young when you get a zit on your chin?

Did absolutely NO knitting today, and was jonesin' for it. Missed the olympics, as I got some serious work done in front of the old tv with the needles. Packed up the new yarn I bought this weekend to take back tomorrow, tried again to make the strange combo work, and it's not an enjoyable thing.

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