Thursday, September 30, 2004

debate debate debate yadda yadda yadda

MAN, I'm trying so hard to be open minded, but I'm tired of hearing GW say the same dang thing over and over and over and over. I have to give the man credit, he speaks well and shows emotion and is pretty charismatic (compared to Kerry, not compared to a normal human) but OMG find something new to say! If I hear "uncertainty" one more time I might SCREAM again. PLEASE. Oh God, it's apparently catching as now Kerry is doing the same comments over and over and over.

OK, the really important part of this debate is that surely Ms. Heinz-Kerry can afford a hairstylist, can't she????? For the love of all that is holy, get that mop under control! Can I take a donation of products to send her way? Just say no to frizz.

I think I'm going to have to start watching the Daily Show again. I can't take the boring flat news any more...

SCREAMMMMMM OK, the wonderful (PERFECT FOR THE GAUGE) sexy tank is NOT working up big enough. I've got 5" of ribbing and it's supposed to be 16" across and it's not even that with a major stretch. I thought, maybe it will still work, but when I hold it up to me it won't cover the chubby belly. DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT

Bathroom update (come on, you know you're dying to hear more potty-time talk) so Miss Hateful's daughter hurt her ankle and she had to leave work early this afternoon. Her daughter is a sweet kid and I hope she's ok. BUT, now I guess the ickies will go on until I go insane and bring the rubber gloves & toilet cleaner & mop to work! OK, we think we figured out who left the nasties on the toilet and it is not surprising. The chick is nuts. I heard my old assistant saying Miss Hateful was saying something about me to her boss and Miss Grumpy (the ex-librarian) and I thought she was saying I was the one rubbing my butt all over the floor like a dang dog doing circles on the carpet and I was going to get a little pissy. Turns out Miss H. was just bitching about me with the regular complaints. Good thing as I just want it noted for the record that I use toilet paper for God's sake.

One other obnoxious thing happened this afternoon. In order to finish the work Miss Hateful left, I had to go work on her computer and sit in her throne. My assistant was joking about how much friendlier Miss H. looked now. ha ha ha. THEN the local boss came out and said, Christine, you look good in that chair....maybe we should think about a switch. Little man, you don't wanna go there. I have about 3 ounces of patience left and that is cutting it dangerously low.

SO while I'm trying to do a 15 minute little job, the newer chic was just talking on and on and on and on about strange things. I almost felt sorry for Miss H and Miss G. to have to work with her all the time. I mean it was like having Dustin Hoffman from Rainman sitting there on her little heating pad......HEATING PAD for CRAMPS....anyone anyone...??? She's nuts. Instead of getting some little detail off the Ford website for her report, she went on and on about how she was going to pretend to be a college student and call them to ask the question and then she could pretend to be a car designer and then and then and then I swear to GOD I almost punctured my eardrums with paperclips........She's like a really tall rainman...I left at 5:05 (TOTALLY out of character for me, normally I hit the door at 5:01 at a dead run) and she was sitting on her little heating pad STILL talking and NO ONE was there....creepy.

Tired of reading??? I'm tired of typing. I'm trying to get the guts to pull out my ribbing...maybe I'll leave it on the needle since it looks so darn pretty and just pick up a larger pair and try again.....DAMMIT

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