Thursday, November 11, 2004

The Chubby Chronicles

"Well-behaved women rarely make history."
--Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

The world needs a few more quotes, ok, maybe just I do. ANYWAY, blog is now BORING, so 0ne of my new goals is snazzing things up, adding better and more recent pics and all that. I'll be working on that this weekend.

Knitting update-->completed Auntie's scarf! Woo Hoo, get to wrap it up for xmas....I love wrapping gifts almost as much as I love ripping them open! My daughter loved the soft & fuzzy red/orange scarf I gave her for part of her bday present. I made one for her school's auction to go with a gift certificate to the LYS and she was begging for one.

Writing update, I FINALLY have a few words, but what was I thinking???? 50,000 words???? It's supposed to be fiction, and it pretty much has become a chick-lit kind of thing posed as an extended blog with the main character a 36 yr old red headed single momma of 2 redheaded kiddos who tries to use these new addictions of knitting & blogging to figure out who she is, where she fits into the world, and bitch about people who piss her off like crazies in the dungeon....IT IS TOO FICTION, I added a few details here & there. The sad thing is that I was most inspired last night on the chapter called The Chubby Chronicles.

The gist of the chub chrons is my getting tired of being chubby tirade. It started with my diet of yesterday....breakfast was a green&white hot tea (healthy) followed by 2 homemade chocolate chip cookies (hey, my buddie got a new stand mixer and it would have been rude to resist, ok, they were GREAT and I wanted them in my tummy and was doing good to only have 2), lunch was 2 peanut-butter chocolate chip granola bars & a diet coke, dinner a few bites of some spicy nasty expensive dinner at the Cheesecake Factory and you guessed what the evening snack was, CHEESECAKE and I mean good CHEESECAKE with strawberries and oozing stuff.... Yup, the day started with grand illusions of healthiness and slimness and was just shot to hell. Well, the combination of those closet ghosts shrinking all my pants and my lovely diet and no-exercise plan have worked that even the duck walk isn't working on the jeans any more. I found myself knitting on the couch with my pants unzipped. WHAT IS THAT??? Al Bundy knitting? I might as well buy myself a trailer, wear the so-tight-jeans-we're-scared-they're-gonna-bust look that is only completed by a torn concert tshirt and a butterfly ankle bracelet (except my damn ankles are too tight for that part of white trash crap anyway) and date an unemployed guy named Trevor.

I FORCED myself back onto the treadmill...the one that not too long ago I was cranking out 3 miles jogging/day and was only 5 pounds from the "ideal weight" for my body type....then was drastically derailed by all things chocolate and sitting on my butt... Made it walking fast for 1 mile, was all inspired and pissed off and stalked around the basement doing 50 walking lunges (actually 100, but you don't get to count each leg individually as that apparently pisses off the slim thigh goddesses and they add extra cellulite when you try that). I lived through 25 counter pushups (I'm a wimp, standing up and leaning against the kitchen sink is as good as this chic gets so far--regular pushups I can do 2). As a reward I allowed myself to knit for one hour and then sat to type and type and type about the "new plan" for the "new body". We'll see.

My biggest accomplishment of the day was walking by the chocolate zingers package in the QuickTrip that was calling my even had the extra free zinger in the bonus package, but I said NO.

Some people strive for world peace, some for world domination, I strive to walk past a bag of zingers. I think it takes about the same amount of effort.

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