Thursday, August 11, 2005

I'm all pampered now

OK, so thank you to Miss Teresa for the Pampered Chef party last night! I realized I have some seriously cool stuff from PC parties in the past, but they're all still in the damn boxes. Actually, they were in their boxes under my bed. Chillzone serving thing with deviled egg side--box. Stoneware Rectangular stone--box. Stoneware Medium Bar pan--box. Stoneware Mini Loaf pan--box. Little metal handle thing to set stonewares on--no box, just under the bed. Then while cleaning out the closet last week, I found little boxes everywhere, a garlic press (only because I got it free, I don't think in my entire life I will have an opportunity to press a garlic clove), Medium Scoop (for making all those cookies on the stoneware cookie pan still in its box, and a pastry blender. Why in holy heckland would I have a pastry blender? I have actually USED my avocado knife/peeler thingy (twice) and I use my apple slicer/corer thing at least once a week. SO, did I do the smart thing and think, no, I don't need any more stuff? NOPE. I got more cool stuff. Good thing I only had 2 mike's hard limeades or I'd have done some serious shopping! bwaaa haa ha haaaaaaaa

I did take everything out of the boxes and am thinking I'll take them to Jeff's house so I'll have an excuse to make stuff there. He gets all amazed and is so stinking appreciative when I cook for him. The sad thing? My level of cooking involves cans, microwaves and stove-tops or the VERY EASY BETTY CROCKER version of cookbooks. I made manwitch sloppy joes with corn on the cob and green beans served on his paper plates and the man thought I'd hung the moon. Seriously, pastry blender? You never know.

I've GOT to get exercising again, I think I am going to try to find a way to get out to their Jazzercise place to help motivate me to reduce the size of my caboose. I'm thinking Tues and Thurs or something. I am quite uncoordinated, so it could be a challenge. My last try of Jazzercise resulted with me hiding in the back row behind the really fat lady because I was all out of breath and then I couldn't see around her to figure out what the instructor was doing. This was back in the day of the full-body leotard and there was a LOT of jumping around, so let me tell you, the view was not good.

If Kansas City is one of the US's fattest cities, why am I constantly surrounded by these damn size 4 chics? Cripes.

OK, so tonight it's going to be spaghetti with a cool bread thing from a COOKBOOK. I'm going to use my stoneware cookie sheet and put chopped tomatoes, roasted peppers (from a jar NOT roasted by me DO you even roast a pepper???) and sprinkled mazzerella cheese on french bread with basalmic vinegar and FRESH basil or some other leafy thing. It's getting a bit wild here, I know. Don't worry, the spaghetti sauce comes from a jar and I'm just adding stewed tomatoes to make it look good.

YES my children live on meals built from frozen stuff microwaved. YES I know that's not the best possible plan and NO I don't want my kids growing up to be freakazoids in the kitchen so I'm working on it. Jeez. Plus I've got pretty stuff to use in the kitchen now, so lookout world, check the smoke detectors batteries, we're ready to roll.

Well crap. I just got the email from the pampered chef lady and since I left early last night, didn't hear that if you spend JUST $50, you get a free cookbook. Well I'm only $8 short, so now I gotta get more stuff. MORE MORE MORE. I'm thinking I need a couple more of these. Coolest thing ever invented. For $3.75, you can open your own damn twist-off bottles without making your man do it for you, it has a big-ass magnet on back to hang on the fridge AND it does pop top can things too. OK, so a kitchen towel held in your hand can do the same thing, but you don't look as stylish doing it.

Anyone in need of a new garlic press still in the box, let me know and I'll send it your way. This poor little thing needs a home in a real kitchen. I'm afraid in my house it's destined to end up in the playdough box.

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