Sunday, April 03, 2005

Why I have to pack my lunches for the next two weeks, a LONG post of my weekend crap

OK, first, I apologize, as I'm sure my feet were not the first thing you wanted to see when clicking onto a knitting blog....Are those not the CUTEST damn lime green shoes for spring you've ever seen? Actually, if they had more of a low kitten heel, I'd have bought 3 pair for when they wear out. But they have this 1/2" heel and are just so freaking cute, I was actually wiping drool from my chin. yes. I really was. creepy, I know. CHECK out the "sessy toes", they're bbbaaaaaaacccccckkkk. It just really vives up the mojo to have sessy toes peeking out. Nothing better, I could be queen of the trailer park with these. Yes, I do have freakishly long toes, and no, I don't really care. They were cheap, but thank God they were in a color just off from all the 9 west bags that were on clearance. I wouldn't get 2 different shades of lime green, because then I'd have to get more shoes to match the other bags, so my money lasted a bit longer. I am taking my new shoes to the LYS to buy some yarn in the same shade. Don't you think I need a felted lime bag? I do too.

The funky pin & earrings are just trashy & tacky enough to be my new favorite things. Loving them.

AND ALL THINGS HOLY, I've made a new friend. Not a nice, normal friend, someone to laugh with, cry with, share stories with, no.... a very special friend, one with UNBELIEVABLE POWERS.....YES, A MAKEUP COUNTER GIRL FRIEND!!!!! bwaaa ha ha ha ha ha HA HA HA HA! (I'm a bit excited, can you tell?) Now, I often have makeup counter girls try to befriend me (I must put out that secret scent of desperation and addiction that just says "I WILL SPEND ALL MY MONEY HERE IF YOU'RE NICE TO ME", I'm marked like the Scarlet woman but my sign is $ instead of the big S. ANYWAY, I have not had a makeup counter friend since my REAL friend Miss Alison left for Denver. She used to moonlight at Lancome's and I'd make a SERIOUS haul at bonus time. Russell and I would each buy one little thing and end up walking out with a trash-bag size each crammed with 3 or 4 of every free bag imaginable and this little tiny size zero Asian beauty scream-whispering "GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT NOW!!!!". Those were the good ol' days, free gifts as far as the eye could see. Since then, the ladies of the makeup have tried to lure me, to be nice, to tempt me with a free sample of some crappy perfume, they have paled in comparison. UNTIL NOW.....I won't use her name so she doesn't get in trouble, but this pretty little thing not only got me just the right cream lotion & wrinkle fighting combo thing I needed, but didn't try to push it when I said I wasn't interested in some other thing, and then she gave TWO free gifts so I could have both color schemes, without me even asking, or begging, or pouting or ANYTHING! It was a good night.

The makeup is actually stuff I will use, imagine that? and I'm all happy. I may even wear eye shadow tomorrow. The makeup bag is being modeled in the shot in front of my other stupid purchase, the home-office collection at Target in Martha Stewart Green, LOVING that too!

Early Mother's Day wishes from my children...For those of you that don't know me well, this won't be too funny. For those that do, you may wet yourself on this one. We were shopping in Hallmark picking up some cards & other must-haves and while I'm waiting for the little blue-haired grandma to ring me up (not exaggerating, I think I have some yarn in that same color of sky blue), the kids were browsing through the cards. Joey comes up to me and says "Mom, on Mother's Day, I'm going to give you this card." and hugged me. It was some momma kitten with her little kitties, all the little old ladies working there went "aawwwww". It was touching. Beth then pulls out a card with an apron and a tray of cookies and said, "Mom, if you were a cooking mom, I would get you this card." No sarcasm, just totally honest and to the point. The grandmas all gasped and I hugged her and said "thanks honey." Since making cookies together has become a semi-annual event, and the last few meals we ate consisted of hotdogs and pork-n-beans, this wasn't too far from the truth. Once my latest order from Pampered Chef comes in, we'll be making more cookies, banana bread and pizza. NO I don't cook and YES I still buy things from Pampered Chef. Later Friday night I asked Beth, "if I'm not a cooking mom, what kind of a mom am I?" After thinking a bit, she replied, "a knitting mom, a reading mom, a snuggling mom and sometimes a yelling mom." I figured I could work on the yelling along with the cooking, but pretty much it was a right-on analysis.

My assistant was freaking out the other day that I don't color eggs with my kids for Easter each year. I finally told her we don't because I don't actually know how to hard-boil eggs. I know it has something about cold water, and they either sit in the water from the start or you leave them in afterwards, or something. I need to just sit down with a betty crocker cookbook and figure this out. I can pick a hell of a restaurant, though. The scary thing? I ordered one of those cool transmorgification-kind of things from Pampered Chef last year that has one side set up for a veggie tray and the other side for holding deviled eggs and it all sits on a frozen tray thing. I thought to myself, I could make a ton of eggs for one of our get-togethers and bring them in this amazing tray. Said tray is still in its original box. It's really not my fault. I don't remember eating anything other than grilled food my dad made, macaroni & cheese (which I despise to this day) and grilled cheese sandwiches growing up. In 7th & 8th grade, in home-ec class, the group I was in somehow blew up the stove. It actually caught fire and the teacher was all mad at me anyway as I stirred the bisquit batter too many times and it turned out hard as a rock. I was pretty much given the option of taking 2 sets of sewing/needle crafts and bypassing the cooking. Look what happened? I can sew all my own clothes (but I'm lazy and love shopping), cross stitch, plastic canvas, croche, knit, embroider, needlepoint and anything else having to do with fibres, but I just never learned to put food together without burning things down. I do know not to put aluminum foil in the microwave, but I'm not telling how I found that one out. Peeps are fun in microwaves too, but only if they're not your responsibility to clean.

On the previous day's note, I do remember the little "hat" thing they use in hospitals to catch urine & poo samples, and I can't remember what it was called. Man, that would have been easier than trying to balance a bowl from the rim while keeping my fingers out of the line of fire! It's a small, small world!

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