Patriotic Knitting, Farm Babies and a seriously ugly wip

One of my friends at work is the father of a marine that recently graduated from the USMC boot camp. He's getting some training and then will most likely head out to Afghanistan within the next few months. I loved the opportunity to join the ranks of people that have knitted for the armed forces throughout history. The Marine Corps is very specific about the gauge and quality of yarn used for these patterns. If you don't know a marine personally, feel free to knit some and send to the USMC Museum which will send the helmet liners along to men and women that will greatly appreciate them.

You need to use 100% wool. As EZ used to say, wool is warm even when wet and will also not cause any harm if there's live sparks or fire near the helmet liner. I used washable Mission Falls. Marines prefer desert tan colors, but black will work also. These are modeled by me, so I'm sure they'll look much more official on a real marine. Marines rock. The pattern was well written and fun to knit as well.
USMC Museum info and USMC Helmetliner Pattern

OK, now for those asking (hello Chery) there will be NO FARM BABIES!!! I must apologize to my friends here in KC as they've heard this story at least 42 times. You know, I still laugh till I cry each time I think about it. I can't believe I didn't blog about the Farm Babies Incident....

Mexico, Oct 2008. My hubby and I got to go to Cabos San Lucas for a holiday/training session for the hubby's company. (My company does training in Minneapolis in the WINTER, I heart my hubby's company!) One night while there I saw the man at the most drunk level I've ever seen him. The man has a few beers here and there, but rarely gets to a level of stupidity like when he relaxed in Mexico. The man was drunk as a skunk, but with style. Part-way through the night, he came up with this great idea.......

J: Baby, we should have a BABY, baby!
ME: WHAT? (spewing out drink, choking and falling off barstool...good thing there was a lot of sand to cushion the fall)
J: We need a baby! We should have a baby. Let's make one tonight, RIGHT NOW!
ME: WHAT? NO!.... (much unintelligible reasoning followed)

I'd distract the man, we'd head over to yet another bar for yet more fruity and rum filled concoctions and it'd come up again....

J: BABY, we need a BABY!
ME: Do you remember our kids? OUR FOUR CHILDREN? How we're outnumbered? FOUR CHILDREN! (I was physically shaking the man now)

Time would go on. Again it would come back..

J: We need a baby. We NEED a baby. Our baby. It'd be so wonderful to have one together, baby.
ME: What about our farm, honey? We're supposed to move to a farm after our FOUR CHILDREN leave the house for college, remember? the FARM! Dang, can't have a baby. See?
J: Silence. Pondering expression on his face.....
J: Baby, it could be our FARM BABY, BABY!
The rest of the night, he would just look at me, smile and say "our Farm Baby, Baby!"

Let's just say that I made doubly sure to take that little orange BC pill each day while there. The next day Jeff felt like hell and had absolutely NO MEMORY of the whole FARM BABY idea. To this day he thinks I made it up. I found a few of his coworkers to tell him he was, in fact, rambling on about some farm baby.

OK, it's totally lame here in type, but in person, I can totally mimic his words and expression. It's wet-your-pants kind of funny. TO THIS DAY all I have to do is say "farm baby" and I laugh till I cry while he walks away rolling his eyes.

The only farm babies that will join our lives will be of the cow/sheep/chicken persuasion. Holy crap. Another child? Now? wow.


OK, I don't know WHAT the hell this thing will become. All I know is that I like it. I really, REALLY like it. It was this idea hatched in my brain back in yarn school 08. It didn't QUITE turn out how I expected it to, but I'm ok with that. I spun up some thick & thin singles, dyed it in apparently horrificly jarring colors and it's going to be felted. It may or may not turn into a felted bag. Or maybe I'll find an old black or grey sweater at good will, felt it and use this as accent material to sew up a felted bag? Or I may just pull it out at knitting functions just to see the knitters go "WOW!" and jump back. Nothing freaks out a knitter working on a perfectly normal sweater like a spectacularly fugly mix of colors swung out before their eyes. You know it's spectacular when your knitting friends have to fan their faces to get the vision to clear. Wow, indeed. When asked "WHY?" last night I said, "Well, I'm trying to learn to live with color." (I usually dress in black, white, tan, boring colors) I was told "Maybe you should learn to RUN AWAY from the colors!" Who knows what it will become? Maybe it'll get a bit muted when felted.

Such a pretty bloom

How do you selfless giving-away-of-the-knitting people do it? I knit this for my sister in law. I dearly love her and know she will enjoy this. I am not even a lover of the color red as accessories for myself, but I totally want to KEEP it. A little voice inside my head keeps saying, "MINE! MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE!" So, I will do the right thing, since I already showed her the scarf in progress, and she'll be wondering if I show up to family events wearing said scarf. Going to give it to her tomorrow.

I actually still have almost enough of the yarn to make another one for myself. Going to cast on tonight.
Pattern: Tiennie's Old Shale Scarf
Yarn: Collinette Jitterbug in Vatican Pie colorway. Yes, vatican pie. I know, I giggle each time I think about it.
Needles: sz 7's
Modifications: Knit in garter stitch instead of stockinette. I love garter stitch and it will help as I don't think the sister in law will block it if she washes it again.






OH, and we're in the process of buying a farm! 91 acres, a tiny farmhouse, a few outbuildings (one of which would make a fabulous dye lab/craft home), a spring-fed pond and well. It's about 10 miles south of Garnett, KS. NO, I won't be moving there any time soon. We're hoping to move after the youngest 2 go to college, about 10 yrs from now. YES, we'll be spending lots of weekends and summer get-aways there. YES, I'm totally excited and YES I'm also buying major amounts of bug spray. I'm also going to wear my hot orange Mexican Cowgirl hat every time I go down there. SO. FREAKING. EXCITED!

Thoughts of wooly animals grazing on the hills have entered my daydreams, but I'll have to get over my issues in dealing with things that poo. I'm just now getting used to the children, you know. Animals? Yeah. Someone has to feed them, water them, clean them, clean AFTER them, give them medicine, keep things from EATING THEM and clean up the poo. I'm proud of the fact that most of the 4 children now mostly take care of themselves in that area and am not sure if I want to start all that up again as soon as we send the last ones out of the house. I think I'll just read the blogs of those with animals for now.

Joey on one of his inventions at the lake this weekend. A make-shift zipline. Rope, a hill, a hook and a handle from some water-skiing equipment. And the bad mom of the year award goes to..........ME! Seriously? There's a beer bottle right in the corner of the picture. Yes, he's zip lining down a rope (that at least a tree trimmer tied the knots in) over chunks of wood and cement blocks in the winter while his mom's downing a coors light. Boy, motherhood doesn't get much better than that, does it? Cripes almighty. I do actually feed, nurture and look after the children now and again. No worries.

Your White Trash is Showing....

I apologize for the last wimpy entry. I was outnumbered, half deaf and quite overwhelmed. Scary White Trash Mama came out about an hour after the last post. OH yeah. YELLING Scary White Trash Mama, who is definitely NOT afraid of 9 yr old boys. Damn I do love her. Let's just say by 10:30pm all boys were either in beds on the floor or couches in the big tv/fireplace room. They all realized it was in their best interest not to upset the system. Or to upset the Mama. Lights were out, voices were at a whisper. Calmness reigned. I let them watch cartoons and as long as children stayed in their proper beds and voices didn't get loud enough for me to hear them upstairs, they could stay up as long as they wanted. They were all out cold by 11:30. Slept till at least 7am! The next morning they were totally behaved, normally squirrely boys. They played video games, legos, race cars and said "please" and "thank-you" at breakfast. I even overheard the boys comparing notes on how this was the "best sleepover EVER" so apparently I didn't scar them for life. I was able to sit and spin all morning with a smile on my face. Scary White Trash Mama rocks! I do love my alter ego's.

Note to self: The next time each mother jokingly (or totally serious in one case) gives me permission to beat upon her children, I need to ask if I can give them a little bit of benadryl instead. :) OK, OK, I'm totally kidding now. It is a pretty thought, though. It's really a miracle anyone ever comes to our house, isn't it?

Ok, this is totally a summer project for me. A table top at a local bar & grill had a design all made of BEER BOTTLECAPS! How cool would a table of Mike's Hard Limeade bottlecaps be? How much fun would it be to GET all those bottlecaps? I see many very, VERY easy knitting projects ahead for me this summer. Friends don't let friends knit drunk, and all that. right?


My poor-woman's niddy noddy. The key to it is to insert an old-time long, skinny metal knitting needle or tunisian crochet hook inside the bobbin and then the winding takes MUCH less time and effort. Of course, I didn't hit upon that little idea until the 10th bobbin I wound. Yes, I have a real niddy noddy in the plans for hubby to make for me and I have friends that have some I could borrow, I just was ready to skein up some yarn at 1:30am. What's a girl to do? It worked fabulously.

I know they LOOK like 9 year old boys...but they're actually brain sucking aliens taking over the world, one mom at a time...

Do you see me covering my ears and cringing in the corner? I didn't even know my daughter was snapping this picture. Slam dancing in the mosh pit of a heavy metal rock concert would have been easier on my ears and body than living through that version of the happy birthday song. What the HELL was I thinking? Sure, have 4 of your friends over for a sleepover party. Sure, Jeff, go on to the farm, it'll be no big deal, I can totally handle a few 9 yr old boys. OH MY HOLY HELL. It's 10:38pm and I've already turned out the lights and stuck them all on sleeping bags in the fireplace room. No, the fire is out. I was at least on the ball enough to have that little detail ironed out. I've already threatened that the next boy that starts wrestling and/or screaming will spend the rest of the night on my bedroom floor. God knows I won't be up there for the next four hours, but it did seem to freak them out a bit and (knock on wood) so far they're keeping it to a moderate roar. Did anyone SEE me smoking crack? Did I have a lobotomy when I wasn't paying attention? Did I forget that I don't like to be outnumbered by children? AND I've done absolutely NO knitting or spinning. Grrrrrrrr. In my head I was thinking that I had video games, pizza and movies. What more could I need? I'd sit and spin and knit and they'd just play away. 10:41. And the moms aren't coming until 11am tomorrow morning.

So, back to the original reason for the post. On Thursday, I had an epiphany. Not just any epiphany, a KNITpiphany. It was a brilliant idea! Something I couldn't believe no one had thought of before! I've been piling up a lot of socks that are in need of darning. SIX pair have one sock with a hole in it now. That seriously cuts into my wearable sock pile. SO, instead of wasting time darning up the holes, I have this great freaking idea! Why not wear two of the socks from the darning pile that don't have holes in them? At the same time? My feet will be toasty warm, I won't have to spend time darning and no one will be the wiser! What a brilliant idea!


Brilliant, except for the fact that apparently my new pair of slacks SHRUNK in the wash and I didn't realize that fact. AND though no one usually comes into our little office, that day I had at least EIGHT people to walk around the office and sit and meet with. SO with every step I saw a little flash out of the bottom of my eye......TEAL......BLUE......TEAL......BLUE.... you get me? Yeah. Those nice long black pants and the black shoes that should have made my brilliant idea, well, brilliant didn't quite work out as planned. I got really odd looks from the gentlemen I was meeting with. There's just no way to cover that up. My pants were literally an inch and a half higher than the edge of my shoes. WHILE STANDING UP! The only saving grace was at least I hadn't broken out one of the bright orange socks. Sweet mother. Every time I think of something and am astounded that no one had done it before...something like this happens to me. Yeah. Maybe someone DID think of it but had the sense to wear the socks while AT HOME or WITH LONGER PANTS or just spend the few minutes darning the darn things in the first place.

10:51pm. I've already had the whole bunch go ape and escape on me. Running around the house like crazy people. You'd have thought they'd be a bit worn down by all the jumping, running, dancing, wrestling and general craziness by now, right? Damn.

OH, I have shots of a baby knit IN ACTION! Little Harper (my new niece!) modeling her baby shrug in dream in color classy (washable wool) bought at misknits! LOVING this. I can't decide if the 2nd shot looks like Popeye or if it's her pirate arrrrrgh look. So freaking cute.

It kinda looks like a sunset.....

It kinda looks like a sunset if you squint a lot and drink a little, or if you drink a lot and squint a little. After mentioning this to my dear friend Teri, she pointed out the fact that I both drink AND squint quite often so I should be good. Only problem is that I don't spend a lot of time around OTHER PEOPLE who are drinking and/or squinting, so unless I decide to start spending a lot of time in the local bars I'd probably better find another way to use this yarn.

In real life, it's just, well, horrid. The stitch pattern at the top just really doesn't work for this yarn. But I HAVE learned something. I do love this yarn, I don't mind it in stockinette, I absolutely love it in garter stitch, and it's WARM. Taking the advice of some local spinners I got to sit & spin & EAT with on Sunday, I've decided this yarn still has a future as a wearable piece of clothing. It's going to either be a garter stitch button band/neckline/edging for a body of a cardigan or it may become a stripe in a Zimmerman EPS sweater of some sort. It just isn't living up to its potential (damn, how often have I heard those words in my youth?) and I'm going to find a way for this funky bright sunset-ish yarn to shine.


I'm also still on an orange kick, so have made some serious progress on Bonne Marie's Eyelet Cardi out of some gifted cascade 220 from another dear friend Chery. Picture is showing a bit brighter than real life, still working on the new camera's settings. It's a lovely orange and not at all needing sunglasses to knit as it may seem in the photo. I truly love ChicKnits patterns. They're well written, easy to knit, classic, stylish and FIT ME!

I'm getting closer on my wheel decision. I think I've narrowed it down to a choice between a Fricke double treadle with wooly winder or an Ashford Kiwi with jumbo flyer attachment. SUCH a hard decision!!! I'll also probably begin destashing a bit to help pay for whichever wheel gets to come home with me.

How's everyone doing in the big year of the stash? I'm totally falling in love with my yarn all over again! I didn't get to go to even one yarn shop while in Minnesota last week. Can you believe it? Probably the only way that my stash hasn't grown yet in 2009. I'm sure it will, I'm not going all cold-turkey here, just trying to shop from the stash first. I was so busy with lunch meetings and dinner meetings that I didn't even get to visit either of my MN knitter friends. I've already arranged to have a little more time on my own when I go back in April!

OH an I went skiing with the girl scouts on Saturday in the upper teens/lower 20's, wore my alpaca hat & cowl and was NOT COLD! I did have to put up the edges of my coat to help shield the ears when I was really flying down the hill, but other than that I was absolutely alpacaishly toasty! On SundayI saw this lady spinning up some of the very same alpaca that I made my hat & cowl out of. I LOVE THAT FIBER. Once I get a wheel, some more of the Don Giovani colorway of fiber WILL be shipped to my home. It may even be there waiting for the wheel to arrive. I said, "OH, you're spinning MY ALPACA! Look!" and brandished the hat and cowl in her face. She said, "Actually, this is from MY alpaca. I own the Alpacas in Wildcat Hollow Alpaca Farm and this was from my actual alpaca." HOW cool is that? I visited her amazing farm when I went to Yarn School 08. After mildly freaking her out that I knew the names of which alpacas my fiber came from, she realized I was just a fan and not a crazy stalker woman and we had a very nice time spinning and chatting.

I've got to get a shirt that says "Got Alpaca?".

Best. Knitting. Tool. EVER!

PAPERCLIPS!!! These things are unbelievable. They are now a permanent part of my knitting bag. I've also stashed some in the truck for when I'm out and about and without my knitting tools.

Need a stitch holder? Paperclip it.


Knit Picks' Options needles coming loose and you left the little key thing at home? Paperclip it.


They're also handy if you've dropped a stitch on lace or itty bitty stitches and don't have a crochet needle handy. In short, they rock. Stick some in your knitting bag. I imagine if you unbent them you could even knit from them if you had to.

In addition to 2009 being the year of knitting from the stash for me, it's also going to be the year of knitting up my handspun.
Just in time for my trip to Minneapolis, the hat is from the first alpaca I spun at yarn school and the cowl is from the 2nd batch of handspun I created in December. It's so unbelievably warm and alpacaishly soft. The fact that I look like a total dork in it doesn't even phase me.


This is a scarf using Yarn Harlot's one row handspun scarf pattern. I dyed this fiber at Yarn School last fall, spun it up in November.


Has anyone ever noticed how beginner spinner's yarn is a lot like a toddler with a runny nose and bad attitude? Only its mother could truly love it. You can see the potential there, but it's a clumsy, slightly cruddy little thing. And it sometimes gives you headaches. But I love it anyway.

Psychedelic Yarn Barf. not a good start for 2009

We all know how yarn has a life of its own, right? I'm not the only one? Yarns behave differently depending on the gauge, drape and design picked for it. You have to be a bit of a fiber-mind-reader and detective all rolled into one. What an amazing thing it is to pick exactly the project a yarn is meant for! You can almost hear the yarn singing as you knit along. The entire process is a joyful thing and the end result is your new very favorite sweater/shawl/mittens/etc. It's a special moment that just doesn't always happen around here all that often.

Unfortunately, most of us have had an experience (or twenty-three) where we tried to force a yarn to become something it was not meant to be. It doesn't matter that the fiber, gauge, drape and all that jazz is spot on. No, that yarn has decided it is Not. Going. To. Cooperate. Forcing yarn to become something it doesn't want to be can be worse than dealing with a moody pre-teen girl. Believe me, I've got experience with BOTH. I've had yarn roll its eyes at me, sigh deeply and flat out pout while tossing its fiber/hair. I swear I've even heard it laugh in triumph when I've grown too frustrated to continue and stuffed the damned doomed project back into a bag and shoved it into the corner.



Well, my current dilemma is a bit different than the usual pouty yarn. What do I do with beautiful yarn that's decided it's quite happy becoming a project that is turning out to be, well, craptastically fugly? Wow. So much is wrong with this project. It's a gorgeous pattern Shalom, designed by Meghan McFarlane. Meghan, I promise, cross my heart, to make your lovely pattern again in a nice solid yarn that will show the gorgeous lines, the romantic feel of the pattern once I'm done with this one. Please don't judge her wonderful pattern by the funkiness that I'm creating.

I love the pattern, the drape, the squoosh factor. It's just, well, horrid. It looks like the toilet cover my grandma had in her basement bathroom in the mid-70's. The one that was filled with mismatched towels and accessories considered ugly EVEN in the time of the Uglies. Seriously? All I see when I keep knitting along is yarn barf. 70's psychedelic yarn barf.



The scary thing? I can't stop knitting it. This yarn has Decided what it wants to be. I'm pretty much powerless to resist. I should do the smart thing and frog it and knit a nice scarf and matching hat. This yarn has spoken to me during its swatching. I've also been there with this yarn from the start. Ok, not on-the-sheep start, but back in the days of its being a white fluffy combed top just waiting to see what it would become. I dyed this yarn. I predrafted this yarn. I spun this yarn. I've spent a lot of freaking time with this yarn. How can I now hold it back from its dream of becoming actual clothing instead of the usual bits & pieces most handspun turns out to be?

Maybe I'll just keep knitting and wear it to the local knitting guild meeting and that will count as wearing it in public. We'll see how it goes. I will proudly say, "Yes. I made that. Yes. It was on purpose. Yes I know I look like a VERY BRIGHT toilet cover from the 70's. It's exactly the look I was aiming for." Then you may see me wearing a fabulous orange scarf and mittens set soon afterwards, we'll just see how it goes.

Oh, and what happens in our house when mom gets grumpy and bans all tv and video games for a couple of nights? Egg Man. You can't see in the picture, but he was carrying around two empty egg cartons like they were big, heavy weights. I've been singing "I am the egg man.....I am the egg man......I am the walrus.....koo koo ka choo...." ever since. Yes, my children are total dorks. Sweet, funny but truly dorks. The apple doesn't fall far from the toilet cover wearing tree.

Big Ass Yarn Sale!

Don't forget to stop by Knit Wit's in Olathe, KS on 12/26/08 to spend some of that Xmas cash!

30% off all yarn
Tons of $3/skein closeouts
20% off glass case, designer handbags, antiques and misc goodies.


9am-5pm.

Anyone remember me talking about not buying any more yarn about 3 months ago? Yeah. Me neither.
I'll be there.

Knit Wit
1815 S Ridgeview Dr
Olathe, KS 66062
913-780-5648

Done!

5:30pm Xmas eve, sewed in last of the tons of ends. I truly hate weaving in cotton yarn. Give me a good spit splice of wool any day.

5:45pm threw sweater into a box, gave it to Jeff, he loved it and put it on.

6:00pm left for Christmas Eve party at his folks' house.

6:30pm Christine ate, drank, was merry and NO LONGER KNITTING BLACK COTTON YARN. It was a good night.

Pictures soon.

Someone promise to smack me upside my head if I decide to make another Christmas sweater in less than a month, ok?

Dec 23rd 9:25pm

One sleeve and neckline done. Half a sleeve and tons of ends to weave. Still knitting and the countdown goes on...

All I want for Christmas is a pre-Christmas space/time continuum

One and a half sleeves to go. Stupid Christmas sweater. Stupid knitter. Thinking, "Oh, I'll knit my husband a sweater for Christmas and it's now DECEMBER 6th!" Cripes almighty.

Turn the square hat completed and delivered. (no pics as camera's batteries were dead.) It rocked. Black cascade 220 with the taupe colored part of a ball of noro kureyon for the brother in law. He loved it and wears it already.

Mom's THIRD and FINAL red hat. Also delivered with no pictures. I really need a new camera. That whole bouncing-on-concrete-and-puddles-of-beer isn't so good on digital cameras. This one she seems to like. Pattern was el capitan and yarn was lambs pride bulky. Gorgeous. I'll get a pic sometime and update it.

Sorry no links to patterns posted, I'm using every spare minute to knit those damn sleeves. I really want Jeff to open his sweater on Christmas Eve afternoon before our family parties, but we'll see. Stop light knitting, bathroom knitting, elevator knitting, you name it, I'm doing it.

I did absolutely NO Xmas knitting last year. I'm thinking that wasn't a bad idea. I'll spend next year doing the "Oh, here's something I knit for you just BECAUSE, not because it's Christmas." Christmas knitting can't be healthy. Seriously, I found myself trying to convince myself that Jeff would really appreciate 3/4 length sleeves to save on time. Yeah. Good thing some of those voices in my head have sense, huh?

OH, to save myself from black cotton yarn stockinette coma (rowan calmer, but STILL cotton, ugh) I made a mini project just for me. (We selfish knitters have a really hard time knitting for just others....one for you, one for me...). Chickadee cowl (free pattern on ravelry) knit out of my hand spun alpaca. LOVING it. Again, I apologize for the crappy pictures. It does stop the wind and is sooooooooo soft and snuggly. I can't wait to make a hat to match out of the other alpaca I spun up. It WILL have to wait until after the Xmas sweater is done. The close-up picture freaks me out a little, as it resembles a bee-hive full of bees all thronging around their queen and bees scare me. Ick. Seriously, it's gorgeous in real life. An action shot will come soon hopefully.




MERRY CHRISTMAS everyone! Happy Hanukkah too! Happy Festivus for the rest of us. Whatever floats your boat, hope it's a happy one filled with friends, family and good, warm knits.

May all your holiday knits be completed on time and may you get to SLEEP at some point in the next four days...I'm not sure I will be.

So, after you get your spinning wheel, you won't have to buy any more yarn, right?

Me "Oh....well.....um.....in THEORY......that is.......welllllllll,........no."

Him "Oh........So, it's just your thing, then? I should just get used to it? Like I do with the knitting thing?"

Me "Yeah. It's just my thing."

Him "Ok then."

Damn I love that man.

SO, I'm on a search. A search for my wheel. My very own spinning wheel. A very long search. A search that includes using every possible form of wheel I can get my hands on. It's a hell of a fun search. This search also includes a massive amount of fiber.

Is there anything cooler than that? That's MY DAUGHTER winding yarn spun by me onto a niddy noddy. Neither of us had a clue of how to use the damn thing. I mean, I've seen it used. In THEORY I know what it's supposed to do, but in practice it's a whole other world. God bless the internets. Youtube to the rescue. We watched a little clip, she sat down, and cranked it out. I was still trying to figure out what went where and how and she had it cranking out! The girl has a gift. She's got the Fiber Gift. But she doesn't much care. Ah well. She's 12. Maybe she'll pick things up for real when she's older. She is working her way through the Harry Potter books now and is excited about each part she comes to, so there's hope.

Yes, that's the migraine scrap blanket in the background along with a big ass bag of fiber. And yes, the migraine blanket actually DOES match the babypoop green colored 60's chair in the corner. Yes, it scares me a little bit too.

So, over the last week, I've quite literally spun my ass off. I can say literally as I've lost about 3 pounds in the last week and I think it's because all my spare time has been spent either spinning or prepping fiber instead of snacking. While I can knit and still snack, I'm not coordinated enough to snack and spin. NO FIBERS OR SPINNING WHEELS WERE HURT IN THE FOLLOWING STORY!!! I actually tried to lick up a piece of air popped popcorn (no oil or butter and no touching with the fingers to slime up said wheel) and it didn't go too well. Let's just say that having both feet moving up and down and fingers pinching and gliding and drafting all at the same time work ok, but sticking the tongue out was just one body part too much to handle and the whole thing exploded into a mess. Popcorn, fiber and ME went everywhere. It wasn't pretty. I actually had to pick myself up off the floor. Again, the WHEEL WAS NOT HURT IN ANY WAY. The fiber didn't even split off. I don't have many gifts, but one is an ability to fall down a half flight of stairs and not spill one drop of beer. This must translate to falling off my chair while spinning and not breaking the fiber. See? I didn't kill all my brain cells in college! I saved the important ones.

I've not taken the time to soak and hang dry the yarn yet and am posting pictures much like a naughty knitter that posts pictures of unblocked lace, but dammit I wanted to finally POST something here! I promise to be a good spinner and take proper pictures soon.

Here's what it looked like before.....






And here's what it looks like now...


Orange and Blue hand-dyed corriedale X fibers from yarn school Fall 08. The orange was spun as singles and plied from bobbins as usual. Beautiful. The blues were actually pit plied, but that's a whole other story. I'll post about that another day. Also beautiful. Next is two more bags' worth of the heavenly alpaca from Alpacas in Wildcat Hollow that I bought from Settler's Farm and some wool from Daisy, a sheep owned by Settler's Farm's owner, shown grazing in the picture above.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I'll be busy cooking, eating and knitting away! Hope you will be too!

Elvis has left the buiding...and that building...and that one...

Trick-or-Treated with Elvis, a devil girl child, a rapper and a freak, none of whom had to wear coats, so it was a great candy-fun-filled night. At each and every house Joey did his Elvis impersonation shown above along with "Thank you, thank you verah much". At each and every house I laughed my ass off. Yes, I have the sense of humor of a 3rd grader. It's sad. I've learned to live with it. Those around me have learned to ignore it. Pictures of the rest of the gang didn't make it due to tequila technical difficulties with the digital camera.

Let's see, what has happened since my last post? Wow. Here you go:

Did not get chewed on by anything while snorkeling in Mexico. Did have a few schools of fishes swim right around me and slightly freaked out, as they were EATING as they went and I figured if they were eating (there were at least 50+ fish about a foot long and 6 inches tall) something even bigger than them would be looking to eat them too and I didn't want to be in the way. At one point they were all bumping into me and I freaked out so much I picked my head out of the water and just didn't look any more. Yeah, because fish with teeth magically go away when you no longer look at them, right?


Did try to knock my husband off the kayak into the Sea of Cortez. Did not go through with it. I didn't stop because he's the love of my life and my true soulmate. I did it because when I leaned around to swing my paddle at his chest we swayed and I almost dumped my own ass into the water. You can't judge me. You weren't there. You would have tried to knock his ass off the boat as well. Ok, maybe you wouldn't have, but you sure would've thought about it. They don't call it the "divorce boat" for nothing. Later that night (after said husband kissed my ass all night for being such a jerk) this other couple was laughing about how they had "a little tiff" on the boat. Then the wife said to me, "what was that funny name you called Jeff as we paddled by?" I said, "um, well, most of my names started with fuxxing asshole....." "OH!" she said, "No, I think it was something like 'there's no wussies allowed on the sea' or something." I said "OH, yes, that was at the beginning of the adventure." (I think the word I used started with a P, but who am I to argue?)

Did not knit a damn thing on the whole trip. Did actually get a sock out on the trip home, but slept for both flights.

Did learn that digital cameras don't do well after they bounce upon concrete floors after being dropped from the height of about 15 feet in the air while dancing with company bigwigs on a bar. That's why the pictures you'll be seeing here for the next few weeks will most likely be total crap. I can take pics, but can't see anything, if it's focused, if it is centered in the frame, if it's even in the picture. Taquila Technical Difficulties. Enough said. crap.


Did complete yet another sleeveless turtleneck while on my trip to Minnesota. Because a girl this girl can never have too many sleeveless alpaca and wool creations. It keeps me warm and toasty while not making me burst into flames. Pattern is from Stephanie Japel's book Fitted Knits, my most favorite book of all next to the EZ stuff.


Did start a knitting project that has nothing to do with the gift knitting I'm planning on doing this year for Christmas. It's like my brain is in a little time warp all its own. Cassidy from Bonne Marie Burns in cascade 220. Amazing so far and I can't hardly put it down. I've finished the back and am trying really hard to not start the fronts and sleeves until I knit something for SOMEONE ELSE.

Did survive turning 40 years old. Do any of you remember that post long ago of how I treasure each and every white hair I've got because I earned them? How each wrinkle on my face was from a story in my life? Yeah. It's all bullshit. Getting old sucks. But I also did spend a wonderful evening with some dear friends whom I love even more than the amazing knitterly gifts they gave me! Knitting friends rock. They help you celebrate the good, deal with the bad and knit along through everything life throws at you. I love you guys.
I missed you people. Good to be back in blogland again.

Is there a ten step program for orange addiction?

See, I NEEDED an orange sequined cowboy hat. I have yarn to match it! Oh, and there's only a few rows of sequins along the edges. It's not total tackiness. The pictures will have to wait as I brought the camera along on the trip, but no camera cord. Just wait until the next Sunflower Knitters Guild meeting. I'm going fully corrdinated, baby.

It totally freaked me out seeing all these yarns together in one place. I had no idea I had that much orange. Orange glasses? Orange cowboy hat? Orange socks, sweaters, scarves and yarn to become even more sweaters, scarves, hats, socks, gloves and headbands? Does that scare anyone else but me?

Being an extremely anal woman, I've got to have some sense of schedule in my life. I could get used to the whole laying-on-the-beach-sipping-margaritas thing, but there's a part of me that's going nuts because I'm not living from my franklin planner system. Yes, it's sad. I realize that. I figure in order to not lose my mind or end up in too many hasta-la-wego-blue-drinks hangover again (not pretty) I should set myself a goal or two per day while here.

Goals for today:
#1 Do not fall off kayak into the ocean.
#2 Attach both sunglasses and ziplock bag of knitted socks to floaties for when rule #1 goes to hell.


Good plan. (Thank GOD Jeff got us changed to the kayaking/snorkeling/laying on beaches adventure instead of the rock climbing/ziplining MORE rock climbing thing. Me? Rock Climbing? With taquila involved? (there's a nice little drink/snack break in the middle) Nope. Not me. I fall off rocks WITHOUT taquila and that sounds like entirely too much work. I'll leave that kind of stuff to Stacey. Ah well. Sock knitting on a remote beach? Now that's my kind of adventure. (I can knit very slowly today. Hand is better but a bit touchy).

only in mexico

So, since there's not an abundance of yarn shops, it's totally understandable to buy an orange sequined cowboy hat if it matches the silk yarn you brought to work on a shawl and the Cascade 220 yarn for the February Lady Sweater waiting to be knitted, right?

Damn margaritas.

From the tip of the Baha Penninsula

I must say, this whole sales training thing is pretty sweet. Jeff's company has a training session and teambuilding event in San Jose del Cabo, at the tip of the Baha penninsula in Mexico. Thank God for frequent flyer miles. Basically the trip cost us $30/night to add me to the room. Period. Yes, life rocks. SO, we came down a day and a half early to spend some honeymoonish still early married lovey dovey time together. It was very sweet, very romantic and filled with the occasional dumbass moments as well.

Apparently because we're at the tip of this landmass in the Pacific ocean, we've got a serious riptide/undertow thing going on. Each and every piece of information the hotel has uses ALL BOLD TYPE to tell you about the three lovely pools and the safe protected public beach down the way, and says "DO NOT SWIM ON THE BEACH OUTSIDE THE RESORT" in really, really big letters. On signs. On paperwork. Apparently big ass riptide and rougue waves means "good time swimming" to my little outdoor man. Oh hell. Well, I made it in to about my knees, and was just getting used to the whole slamming waves/sucking your feet out from under you thing, when WHAM BAM NO THANK YOU MA'AM I get hit by a SIDEWAYS riptide. nice. After getting rolled and tossed around like a ping pong ball in a blender, I came up sputtering for air and dragged myself the last 2 feet to the shore. My ocean swimming was done. Apparently they call that a "Mexican facial." sweet. I have to say my face and about half my body is nicely exfoliated. The scary thing? He's not even the only dumbass down here. There were a bunch of these people out crashing in the waves. At least he agreed to only go out to the 3rd set of big crashing rolling waves. There were those going out further, dumbass, dumbass, dumbass.

SO, one would think that three days of Jeff attending meetings would mean some serious knitting time for me right? Plus all that airline time? Yeah. I had some freak hand cramp thing where I COULD NOT KNIT. NOT ONE FREAKING STITCH. Waiting in the KC airport? no knitting. On the plane to Chicago? No knitting. On the plane to Cabos? no knitting. NO KNITTING while sitting by the pool. I have such sympathy to those knitters out there dealing with arthitis and other ailments. I just had this freaky ache in all my finger and knuckle joints that I couldn't knit or even hold onto anything. It was freaky and really frightening. It wasn't like a normal knitting cramp, it was almost like a weak paralysis thing. Scared the snot out of me actually.

I was prepared and at least had knitting and spinning magazines along so could READ about knitting. I decided to treat the ailment with NO KNITTING for two entire days, and keeping the hand wrapped around a cold drink. I felt strawberry margaritas were the best treatment, but one day of that didn't make a dent in the poor crippled hand. After moving to the "hasta la wego" (totally don't know how to spell that drink), it means "goodnight!", my stomach and head are a bit shaky today, but the HAND is ABLE TO MOVE!!! There will be some very gentle sock knitting today! WOO HOO! But I think no more hasta la wego's for me.

Another 91-95 degree day awaits. There's always a constant breeze and not too much humidity so it's absolutely fabulous to sit and knit. Life is good.

OH, and I think I talked Jeff into getting us switched from the whole rock climbing, cliff jumping, zipline riding adventure into the kayacking over to the beach near the arch above and snorkeling. OK, Jeff's snorkeling and I'm sitting my ass on the beach knitting. Gotta love those ziplock bags. Cross your fingers for the kayack trip to have 2 spots open!

We need a knitting superhero

Can't you just see it? Able to shoot icord out of a project bag hanging from her wrist? Swinging along from building to building?

Another superhero prop? Wool socks. Serioulsy. A pair saved my butt last week in Minneapolis. WHAT kind of a car rental company doesn't put an ice scraper in their freaking cars in MINNEAPOLIS? Early morning hard frost. Me, driver's license and wool socks on my hands. It worked fabulously.

I got to attend the Minneapolis Knitting Guild while there and it was such fun! WOW those ladies and men are organized! Tons of activities, charity programs and I got to mee THE Kiki from the new book Kiki's Hats, who was an amazingly charming and modest lady that was the subject of this book. She's made thousands of hats and given them away with the charge that you must take 2, one to give to someone else and one for you. Then she asks people to write, email or call and tell her where they went. The hats have gone around the world. The author came and read the book and it was just a wonderful evening.

I also got to reconnect with my yarn school roommate Deb! That woman loves fiber and fiber shopping as much as I do, it's quite scary actually.

I guess we're all knitting superheroes. Don't you ever feel like you change a little bit of the world when you give away a knitted gift? *sigh* Too bad knitters don't run the world. Yet.

What kind of a knitter am I? Pathetic. Just pathetic.

So I travel to Minneapolis 5-6 times a year now. Not really a problem as this state has more than its share of two of my favorite things, yarn shops and liquor stores. Reeeeeeaaaaallllllllly long winters. You'd think I'd remember that fact and pack something warm. Wouldn't you? It's freaking COLD up here. I know, I know, OCTOBER. Yes, I sometimes am a dumbass. What kind of a knitter goes to somewhere COLD and brings no warm knitted clothes? No hats. No gloves. No wrist warmers. No shawls. No scarves.

At least I brought a leather blazer. I did actually check the weather before I came up here, it said lows of 48-50's and highs of 60's. I thought I'd be good. Yeah. It's 30-something outside. AND I have to be at work at 7-freaking-O'clock in the morning. When it's cold outside. Ah well.

Only good thing is that I got a TON of knitting done on my 2nd sleeveless turtleneck sweater. Made out of frog tree merino, I figure this under the leather blazer should keep me toasty if I can get it done by Wed. evening for my Christmas dinner. Yes, Christmas dinner. In October. Apparently it was the only way they could work out getting the KC team together with our bosses here in MN. Being one of those people that starts singing Christmas carols the day after Halloween, this seems to fit somehow.

Wanna know how to really freak out someone on an airplane? I mean BESIDES just sitting quietly knitting? Why is it that still freaks people out so? Try spit splicing some yarn. I guess I didn't even think about it. I'm knitting quietly, listening to my ipod. Knitting with circular needles so I'm not even scaring the guy with a possibility of any random poking from double points. Run out of the ball of yarn, pull out the next one and after splitting the ends into different lengths, breaking the bits (never ever cut the ends for the splice), lick my hands, and quickly rub together. Ta Da, a perfectly joined piece of yarn. I hear a gasp (which must have been pretty loud as I had the "baaa da daaaaaa's" on that 500 miles song "I'm gonna be" from the Proclaimers (remember it?".....and I would walk 500 hundred miles and I would walk 500 more....just to be the man who walked a thou sand miles to fall down at your door baaa da daaaaa....baaa da daaaaa...." ANYWAY, to this loud gasp I look up thinking, WOW! Here's a man that appreciates a well joined yarn. Yeah. Due to the look of supreme horror on his face, this was not a man impressed by the spit splicing abilities of this knitter. Ah well. Good song, though.

At least they're wollemeise

This is how my boy went to school the other day. In public. With a green shirt on. And dark blue shorts. And red crocks. And hand knitted blue socks.

I did actually point out that um, well, NOTHING he was wearing matched. "That's ok mom, I like it. It's my woolly style."

I think I like that. Not enough to wear something like that, but I still like it.

Looks like I have another hat...

ME: Here honey, try on the hat I just finished. It's the Goin' to the Barn Chore Hat from that kit I bought you.
JEFF: It itches
ME: NO HAT FOR YOU!
Snatched off his head. I love it. I've not got a finished pic yet, will get around to it sooner or later. The hat-in-progress shot is modeled by my daughter. (who never said ANYTHING about it being ITCHY, being a good daughter who appreciates knitted wool hats) The outer hat is a bit rough, but there's a lovely alpaca lining that is against your ears, so NONE of the itchy touches any part of your body that should itch.
*sigh* Guess my man's destined for superwash wool sweaters or cotton. I did the cotton one once as the boyfriend sweater. To his credit, the man wears it all the time. (And is still quite proud of his "solution" to the bleached spots he got on it. A sharpie marker. A not-quite red but actually a bit hot pink sharpie.) Well, I love my hat. Warm and snuggly. I look forward to breaking it in during the cold months to come.




Speaking of the boyfriend sweater....here it is in action. Driving our NEW BOAT! Ok, new-to-us boat! It's a 1988 Cobalt, which they call the Cadillac of the lake. It's just exactly what we needed. The last few summers we've borrowed other motor boats that were monster speedsters and basically beat the crap out of us while we tried to just stay in the freaking boat. While Jeff enjoyed it, the rest of us....not so much. This baby is HUGE, heavy as hell and just cruises through the waves. Love, Love, Love it. The only drawback is that we had to sell the camper. *sigh* I know we only used it twice and all, but DANG I loved camping in it. I was so far above the dirt and bugs and such and had screened windows and doors and a TOILET IN A CABINET. That's my kind of camping. Back to the tent in the dirt with the whole dang group piled on top of each other. *sigh* Freaking family closeness and all that crap. Ah well. We'll get much more use out of this boat. PLUS I can actually KNIT while riding on it. I am not exaggerating when I say I've always had to hold on to the boat and my kids with all my strength before, so this is going to be great for our summer fun.

Some of my hand dyed goodies all wound up. They're even more fun this way. I'm going to have to get knitting! I want to see how they turn out! (sockyarn and then my cormo laceweight)