Every little girl needs a little trophy

Well, I did some serious knitting on Saturday out at the KC Soap Box Derby race in KC! My girl raced two years ago, but it was pretty much go down the hill, lose, repeat and go home. This was a whole different girl driving a whole different car with a whole different attitude! She's such a quiet, gentle soul. I loved that fact that after a run or two down the hill and winning them all brought out this competitive, fiery girl (yet still polite as heck and gentle). I haven't figured out where that gentleness came from yet, but I do love it too. The girl ROCKED! She won and won and won and won until there were two undefeated kids left in her division. She finally started driving with a few tiny wobbles (later we found that her steering cable had come loose but you can't do any fixing or adjusting once the race has started) and she just barely lost and then ended up taking THIRD PLACE!!! Can I get a woo hoo? WOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOO!!! I was so proud of the way she hung in there and raced against these kids (only 5 of 19 were girls) and just was such an elegant champion. The trophies are HUGOMONGOUS because this is the big season-ending race (her first for the season since we just got going again) and the winners of the two divisions go on to a week in Akron, OH and race in the world championships. The trophy is only 2 inches shorter than Joey. Elizabeth just about died when she went up and claimed her trophy and saw it was one of the three big monsters. We thought she'd get this nice, normal sized thing since it was 3rd biggest on the trophy table, but we didn't realize the 1st place trophies were in another area so she got the big dog. The car was a kit put together by Elizabeth and her grandpa (my dad) and Dad and some of his car-mechanical-engineer friends tweaked and worked on it hours and hours and hours. Elizabeth practiced and worked on learning to drive the lanes to get the best speed and least wobbles and they all just did great.

Here's a photo of the almost finished Coquette Lace tube top from Stepanie Japel's Fitted Knits book. I'm loving it, but will need to add some elastic thread sewed in around the top and may have to add straps. It's made of cashcotton, so I'm expecting it to get wider and then drop like a motherbugger once I wear it. I'll also wear it with a neutral colored bra, this black one looks funky through the lace pattern. Love this book! I just realized this is the 3rd project I've made from this book (sleeveless turtleneck top and ribbed shrug) and I love them all. I've NEVER made 3 items from one book before. I've also not posted anything about the last 2 projects in the fitted knits blog. Bad blogger. I'll get there.

Survived camp but only barely

Monday at camp sucked. sucked hard. Let's just say rain, rain, rain, tiny bit of sunshine that baked the 100% humidity for a little while then torrential rain and wind. more rain. Oh and 26 boys in our troop where everyone else had 6-12. Also two schools joined together and the boys in one school were a titch more rambunctious than the other. I got punched in the side of the throat by an 8 year old the size of a 15 year old. His mom was there. He said he was "trying to tickle" me. His mom said, "oh those boys!" I thought I did well in not saying what I thought of her child and I also didn't pick the child up by the throat. Because boy scout moms are not supposed to do that I'm guessing. I had a good raincoat, so the only part of me that was really wet and miserable was my feet. They were squishy from 9am till I got home at 4:30pm. Let's also explain how much fun I had because I FORGOT MY FREAKING SOCK PROJECT. Sitting on the bus waiting to leave at 7:30am with no knitting. Riding for 20 minutes with no knitting. SItting under the shelter at lunchtime for an extra 45 minutes in the downpour with no knitting. Getting onto the bus early also in torrential rain and sitting there for 40 minutes before we left with no knitting. 20 minute ride home with no knitting. Combine the whole no knitting thing with squishy feet and psycho children (and some very nice and cute boys as well) made for one pissy ass momma.

Tuesday was much MUCH better. No rain, KNITTING and early in the morning I put the fear of ME in the few boys that I was trying hard not to pummel with my highly honed mom looks and one boy I even said if he didn't quit kicking and running away from the group and punching boys I was going to make him walk all over the camp holding my hand everywhere we went and I'd have one of the other moms kiss him. The rest of the day was smooth as silk. The moral of the story? Well if your kid is a pain in the ass, don't send him to camp with me. Joey and his friends had a ball. They shot bb guns, slingshots, did crafts, played games, went for hikes and just had a blast. I have to say my favorite part of Tuesday was ARMPIT FUDGE. mmmmmmmmm For those with kids that like to go camping, this is a must make! In a sandwich baggie you put 2 tablespoons of cream cheese, three little pats of butter, 1/4 cup of powdered sugar, I think it was 2 table spoons of cocoa and a splash of vanilla. Smoosh the air out, seal well and wrap up and squish together to mix. In order to properly mix it all up, you've got to melt it down a bit. You stick the baggie in your armpit. Open the top and eat with a spoon and it's HEAVEN. Armpit fudge. It's a good thing.

What was I working on so dilligently at camp? I had my trusty mountain colors barefoot socks for Jeff. Now I've only made the boy worsted or dk weight socks on larger needles. I'd never made him a pair of the sz 1 beauties I make for myself. I didn't measure his foot, nope. I'm a sock knitter. I know how to do these things. I just cast on and went. I also didn't make them toe up so he could try them on. Nope. I was lazy, already had this yarn wound into a pretty cake, I just went to town. Did I have him try them on mid-way? nope. I was cocky. The knitting goddesses sure do like to bite cocky knitters in the ass, don't they? You think I'd have learned, wouldn't you? Well, I had him try one on after it had been bound off, kirchenered and ends woven in. I'd also started the heel flap on the 2nd sock. It looks like I now have an almost completed really dark and manly pair of socks for myself. cripes. They're actually much more dark grey/black with a little bit of dark red here & there than the pic shows. They're comfy. I've got one more ball of barefoot and I thnk I'll be winding that sucker into two balls and MEASURING his damn foot.




And the thing that looks like a dead orange animal laying on my bed? That splash stuff is kicking my ass. Why is it beginner knitters gravitate to that stuff? I think it's hard as hell to knit with. I was trying a drop stitch thing, but it's not working out. It's gonna have to be frogged and started over but after a few days' break. It is soft and looks better in person, but it still looks like a dead orange thing. I'm going to find a cute pattern for this wrap one way or another.

And the score is.....Knitting Virgin 134 -- Moths 1

I finally got smart and started bringing my own damn lawn chair to the multitude of baseball games we attend for Jeff's two boys. Not only does my butt not hurt from the metal bleachers, this also allows me to be antisocial and knit to my heart's delight. I can avoid being crammed in like sardines and having to small talk with the exwife and also sit back a-ways from the more intense parents. Let me just say HOLY CRAP PEOPLE relax. They're TEN YEARS OLD. This is not the major leagues. HOLY CRAP! Most of the team is from the boys' private school and let's just say a few of the parents are living their lives through their boys a little bit. Just a little bit.

So, while pleasantly knitting away on my really orange socks the other evening in the grass way on the other side of the dugout with Jeff there was an attack. I was divebombed by a kamikazee moth in the center of my forehead. Seriously, this was an attack. Not a randomly flitting around moth flying into my face, no. This thing came at a direct dive from far in the sky and nailed me right in the center of my forehead so hard the thing DIED, or at least stunned itself, fell onto the ground not moving and then I stomped it dead. Jeff almost fell out of his chair laughing. He then explained that the word is out. The moths are out to get me now. I laughed and said bring it on furry critters, I can take it. THEN Jeff irritated me no end by wondering out loud if it was actually a pregnant momma kamikazee moth who was dropping eggs on my yarn before the crash. I laughed a little. Then thought. Holy crap, is that possible? No, no, no. That's silly. No reason to go running home to the microwave. It's fine. I just am thinking a little microwaving once the sock is knit wouldn't hurt anything.

I swear some days I must smoke crack when I'm not paying attention. I'm not much of an outdoorsy girl. yes, I have gone camping a lot lately and have been heading to the lake and doing outdoorsy things, but it's because of the family and honey. I would be perfectly happy looking at the great outdoors through a window from the airconditioning. Ah well. Somehow back in April when it was lovely outdoors I decided it would be FUN to volunteer for Joey's cub scout day camp. Doesn't that sound fun? Well now it's in the 90's, I'm a readhead and sporting a lovely sunburn from TWO HOURS in the sun while wearing slathers of sunscreen and has got to be in the 80% humidity lately. I think when I volunteered I was thinking a couple of hours, should be fun. We have to be at school at 7:30am and don't return until 4:00pm. crap almighty. I've got my water bottle half filled and freezing and my lunch made and my raingear packed. I'm also bringing sock yarn because you just never know. At least there ought to be some knitting time on the bus. Fuxxing outdoors. I'm going Monday and Tuesday. Joey goes Wed & Thurs too. Tomorrow's forecast is for afternoon storms and high humidity.

OH and last Thursday I went to Wamego, KS to visit my best friend in the world, Jildo! We went out for lunch at Chili's in Manhattan and then I talked her into going to the local yarn shop Wildflower Knits and picking out some yarn for me to knit her a hat and a wrap. The girl had never been into a yarn shop before and I totally corrupted her. We petted almost everything in the shop, tried on all kinds of fun samples and decided on some pretty light brown lambs pride worsted for a winter hat and some furry stuff for a shawl/wrap thing. The woman chose furry stuff. I told her only because I love you this much will I knit furry crap for you. It's not actually furry crap, it's very soft and snuggly and in the prettiest orangeish colors of a fiery sunset. But it's furry. BUT Oh we had fun in that shop! I think we must have been in there for over an hour, not too bad for a non-knitter. I gave Jildo a sqaure shawl I'd made from beautiful blues of Koigu that can be worn as either a triangle shawl or a lap blankie. She seemed to like it. It's such a great feeling knitting for people that you love and that appreciate it!

Cross your fingers (or your needles) for no rainstorms in KC tomorrow. Fuxxing outdoors.

Powered up and ready to roll

YES! I found the freaking power cord! (and there was much rejoicing...yeah...yeah...yeah) Monty Python Holy Grail quote, I am that big of a dork. Well, the power cord was still plugged in to the wall in the corner of the office crammed under the big bookshelf full of knitting books and magazines, etc. I totally forgot I was working on the floor last week or so when I last caught up on reading blogs. cripes. Then the camera's cord mysteriously appeared AFTER I went out and dropped $30 at best buy to get some card reader thing since it was cheaper than buying a new camera cord. Man, I'm worse than a little kid. I have ONE DRAWER that my car keys have to immediately get placed in. If they don't go in there, they are GONE. I was working off Jeff's spare set of keys that I wasn't supposed to know about for 2 weeks last time I lost my keys. I now have a drawer for power cords of all sorts. Ok, so it's half of my bra drawer. It works. The good thing is that I'm BACK!!! LOTS of blogs to read and catch up on now.

I promise to post something interesting later, for now I'm just happy to get back to posting! WOO HOO! Here's what I've been working on lately...Completed my two-toned ribbed shrug from the Fitted Knits book. I've already worn this thing 15 times and LOVE IT! Next are two hats made from stash yarn Lorna's Laces Shepherd's Worsted Superwash wool. Joey chose the one modeled by me for his new winter hat (made from Chicknits free hat pattern, the one with the folded brim actually fits me too, but as you can see, I have yet to find a hat that I look good in, so with the super stretchiness of ribbing, will work folded up for my nephew, a toddler. Colors are army-ish looking and look cute on little boys, but Joey's not around for modeling, so you get stuck with my head. He wants gloves made with the remaining yarn, so I'll give them a try. In the 4-item pic are some unbelievably beautiful hand dyed fingering/lace/? weight cotton that followed me home from Cottage Fibers on our knitterly weekend. I don't have any freaking idea what I'll do with it, I just had to have it. AND it was on sale. No idea of yardage, but 4.1 oz for 30% off of $20, can you blame me? It had to be mine. The red tube is a diet coke cozy for my best friend Jildo to check out. I'm using cascade fixation (the stuff with elastic in it) and using the pattern from Knitting with Balls. The dark thing is a freshly turned heel and leg of the first sock of mountain colors bearfoot that is still slowly progressing. The orange is what I cast on to take to the stitch n pitch game this weekend. LOVING IT! Lucy Neatby yarn in vibrant orange and pattern is Hedera. I realized I am, in fact, an idiot. I kept thinking I had the pattern memorized but not quite getting there. So, let's just say this leg will have some wonky lace. I am an anal knitter, but I draw the line at frogging lace socks. Not gonna do it.

OH I had the best knitterly weekend! For the official KIP day, my girls went from 8:30am till probably around 8:30pm. I missed out on the whole getting-lost-almost-getting-carsick fun, KnitWits, the farmer's market (my kids and I did a run-by and fast checkout of the art vendors and told my kids "look for knitters!" but we didn't quite hook up with the girls. I dropped the kids off with my cousin and was kid-free for the rest of the afternoon. I ate really good greek food at the festival, got some knitting and chatting of knitting and gossip in, took the world's longest short-cut across the city to Cottage Fibers and then headed for home. The rest of the gang finished out the day with dinner at the Blue Koi. I finished my day sitting a few seats in front of Jeff's ex-wife facing into the setting sun trying to work on my hederas while sitting through a two hour baseball game.

Sunday I went to the Royals Stitch N Pitch game with my knitterly girls again. HOT HOT HOT and sweaty woooooooo boy. But let me tell you, it was a great game! The Royals won 17 to 5. For those of you non-basebally or non-KC, the Royals really REALLY suck lately so it was quite a feat. The tote bags rocked. I love them. The stuff inside, not so much. I'm not complaining, it's just that hearing about the awesome yarn and needles and accessories knitters got in different parts of the country compared with what we got... ah well. The bags are cool and the day was fun! I'm thinking we need to have knitting be a major part of more weekends around here.

Kids are surviving "camp mom" and I guess this mom is too. I'm trying to work in the am and have succeeded in getting my kids all excited about the reading challenge at the library. Then we either go to the pool or somewhere else on a field trip, farmer's market, bowling, hiking, whatever I can find.

Here's a view of Turdy. Yes, TURDY. I asked Beth why she named her little friend after poo and she didn't even realize that Turty sounded like TURDy. He came to visit our neighbor yesterday and the kids (after a few tears) accepted that it wouldn't be fair to make Turdy live in a box when he could be outdoors with his little turtle mommy and turtle daddy and turtle brothers and sisters we carried him down to the creek. Am I evil or what? Poor kids. I'm sorry, but we just got rid of a PET CRAWFISH that stunk higher than heaven. I'm drawing the line at having ONE DOG as the pet population from here out.



Also Summer Knitty is out. I'm gonna go check it out and see if there's anything I can't live without. OH YEAH, you know I've got to make the backless tank top, and how cute is that skirt on the cover? I think it has my daughter's name all over it.

Shortest Knitting Virgin Blog post EVER

OK, so apparently my power cord to the new laptop is WITH the camera cord which are apparently NOT IN THIS FREAKING UNIVERSE! I have actual pictures of actual completed items, people.

No time, almost out of power. The countdown's on.

In a nutshell, weekend ROCKED. Mountain Colors Barefoot is totally my new preferred camping/outdoorsy sockyarn. No koigu wimpies allowed. I love my koigu, just not in the great outdoors. Family is great, played poker and drank, OH LORD how I drank with my uncles and cousins and tore it up with my little partner in crime cousin K till 4am. Yes, 4 freaking am. Then I went in and slept on a thin layer of canvas on top of soggy dirt. Not quite mud, not quite dirt. Still, it was a good thing. The food, the KNITTING I got done, if I had pictures and power cords, I'd be showing you. The kids got Jeff and my younger cousins and brother Will & his young wife Raegan and about 20 some people out there and had a full contact two hour kickball game. I had a two hour nap and it was good. In the game, Jeff got drilled so hard in the head that he had blood in his smile when he got up saying he was ok. My sister in law Raegan had a serious bruise on a shin, kids all seemed ok, the teens and 20 yr olds tore up the 30-40 yr olds.

Going to the stitch n pitch this weekend with some of my girls, woo hoo!

I'm leaning towards keeping the orange glasses. Everyone but Jeff and my brother like them. The orange is growing on me and I don't notice the green so much. I figure I can just wear contacts if I feel like I'm clashing too much. Jeff came home from his business trip and told me I looked like that old guy that owns the Oakland Raiders. Art Shell? Thanks babe.

Almost out of power, I've cleaned most of this damned house looking for those things. Wish me luck! I finished my two toned ribbed shrug from Fitted Knits and LOVE IT. damn cords.

Tempting nature one more time.....

Well, we're heading off to the great outdoors one more time. There's a 50% chance of thunderstorms tomorrow afternoon and a 20% chance for tomorrow night where we're going camping. In a "fair weather tent." We really enjoy all that extra venting stuff when it's NOT RAINING, but you know, when the wind's a blowin and rain a rainin it's something I could do without. I've got a bad feeling about this, but I haven't melted yet. I'm taking STR socks along and my fitted knits shrug. No koigu to tempt fate. You know, if all hell breaks loose this weekend I may have to deal with the fact that it's ME that's cursed, not the koigu.

Still got the groovy glasses. I went to the shop to see about switching them to a copper/brown normal looking pair and found out I was apparently smoking crack and imagining the totally normal pair of frames because they DON'T EXIST. The only other color combos available in this size of lenses is pink & purple and red & black. nice. Now I have to pick out entirely new glasses or learn to live with these. All in all, they're not that bad of a look, they'd be cool trendy little glasses to pull out for reading or for driving or something, but I have to wear them all the time. And when I want to wear PURPLE or PINK or anything other than black or green or orange they majorly clash. They even clash with my lipgloss. Yes, I really am that anal. I can't even wear a gold necklace with my silver watch on. Now I'm back where I started, in total overload. All those frames, after you try on a few they all start to look the same. Then I get flustered, confused, and start to listen to total strangers. TOTAL STRANGERS who tell me how good the ugliest frames in the shop look on me. It's a conspiracy. They're not happy with their ugly frames so they've got to screw everyone else buying frames so they look better. You know, it's like instead of dieting, the evil people in your office buy you donuts so you get chubbier and they look skinnier standing next to you. This is what happened to me in the bridal shop years ago. After trying on the 10th white fluffy dress my eyes glazed over and mom & I ended up picking out a seriously funky dress because old, grumpy women working for minimum wage and openly bitter about life in general told us that the funkiest one looked "absolutely lovely." The dress worked about as good as the marriage ended up. Let's just say neither one was pretty.

OK, back to the glasses shop. A girl with pink and black striped hair grunted in an approving manner when I picked up even funkier glasses than those I already had. Then a 78 yr old woman told me my orange frames were "kicky" then she ordered the same pair. Nice. I finally realized I wasn't up for the task. I need someone that won't be too nice but totally blunt. I asked my mom to go with me next week. She is the bluntest person I know and let's just say there's no risk of her being "too nice." I have 30 days to find something else to order, so life will go on. For now, I'll be flashing my metallic groovy orange & greenies everywhere I go. OH and I bought 3 pair of those floaty things that attach to the ends of your glasses just in case nature decides to bite me in the ass again this weekend.

Now, the fact that they're metallic and FLASHINGLY orange doesn't seem to show up in pictures. They really are.

More playing on ravelry. Here's my stash. I'm telling you, it was FUN going through all that yarn and seeing what I have buried in there.

And, here's what happens when you leave your camera out on the desk and your kids are verrrrrrry quiet for the afternoon. Here's a few highlights.

Shagadelic

SO, I got my new glasses today. I, um, well, hate them with every fibre of my being. They are orange and green. ORANGE and GREEN. As my best friend in the world, Jildo, put it, "those were the colors that were popular when we were kids, you know, in the 70's." Yes, my new glasses are the colors of shag carpeting. My only excuse is that I was suffering from a medical condition when I went to pick them out last Monday morning. I believe the technical term is called "being out of my fucking mind." I think I was convinced that my b00b problems would result in me getting cancer and having to lose my fabulous hair. Oh, and maybe die. (no drama here, huh?) Well, if I was going to lose my hair, I'm thinking that orange and green glasses would look great. On a normal day, not so much. My personal rainbow of colors that I wear are black, dark brown, denim, off white. Orange and Green. The guy at the eye doctor's shop said to give it a day and if I still hate them to come back and he'll order me some nice, sensible coppery brown frames.

On Saturday I was getting a bit stir crazy from being home so much lately so I loaded up the kids and we went out to the Kansas Alpaca Company, this beautiful farm outside of Ottawa, KS for their Farm Day. Here's a few highlights.

Are you ready to be impressed as hell? OK, so I impressed the hell out of myself anyway. I was working along on Jeff's first sweater (yes, the boyfriend sweater) and it got to the part where I was supposed to do the colorwork mosaic thing. I was going to bring it to my knitting night and have someone show me what to do. I thought, well, I'll just do what the book tells me. Ten minutes later, I had my very first few rows of this amazingly cool actual mosaic crap working on the sweater!!! I just did what it said to do and it freaking WORKED the very first time. So much in knitting is like this. I freak out because something sounds horridly complicated, finally just sit my ass down and when I do it, I'm just like "huh, that was no big deal." How about this? AND IT FITS so far. Top down raglans are the coolest thing ever invented.



Other stuff on the needles...




Coquette Lace Tube Top and Two-Tone Ribbed Shrug from Fitted Knits and a pair of socks from my STR sock club monsoon colorway yarn in plain old knit 3 purl 1 pattern which seems to show off the funky colorways so pretty.

Oh and sweet mother of all that is knitterly, I got my invite to Ravelry!!! I spent about 4 hours taking pictures of my stash to upload. That's not weird, right? OH OH OH I can't wait to get in there and play! Be patient people, they're opening it up and working to get everyone in. I think this thing is going to revolutionize knitting. As big as Knitty.

OK, it's now 2:41am and someone needs to make me stop. I'm turning off the damn computer and putting away the yarn. Ok, not actually putting the yarn away, I'm just shoving the trashbags full of yarn that I was dragging outside for the pics to add to my ravelry account. (yes, Jeff's traveling tonight, so that's why there's bags and bags and BAGS of yarn in every room tonight.

I'm feeling bitchy again, so I must be feeling better!

All tests came back good! No cancer and no pre-cancerous cells! Can I get a woo hoo? WOO HOO! I'm finally feeling myself again. I've also determined that happy pills only work for me for ONE DAY. One dose past that, going into a day and a half, is TOO MUCH and we go from happy to really really NOT HAPPY. OH Lordy I was sick, sick, sick. I'm just now getting moving around without having to walk holding my b00b. Good thing I work at home, huh? It's quite the look for a suburban mom. It apparently became a habit, so when I was slowly shuffling along at the farmer's market in downtown OP Wed. morning and not figuring out why I was geting weird looks. OH, yeah, I'm walking along HOLDING MY BREAST. in public. nice. Thanks again for good thoughts & comments & ecards & emails. You guys are the best. I didn't feel like I was all alone wandering around being miserable, I felt like there was this army of friends with me.

OK, so normal people name their socks, right? Normal sock knitters maybe. Most of mine have normal names, like the sock wars socks I got I call Sock Wars Socks. My first STR socks are Mama's First Socks That Rock Socks. You get it, not too creative. The sock names help me remember where I was at the time of their creation or what was going on in my life. The boring green socks I just finished for Jeff I call the Shut-Him-Up Socks. That should explain itself. Every time he'd see me knitting something he'd ask "who's that for?" and then sigh deeply when I said "me" or charity or for the kids, etc. These socks were knit completely just so he'd SHUT UP about it and leave me to knit selfishly in peace. He did turn around and wear them for 2 days straight to the farm in 85 degree weather, so I'm glad he likes them. I've got lots more to make for him in the future.

Meet FUCX the Great Outdoors Socks. (photos above) I apologize for the funky picture and I've not even woven in ends yet, but I was just so happy to have these things DONE! These socks are well named, let me tell you. I was working on them when we went camping and ended up going through a night of torrential rains, lightning and wind storms and running for the hills at the break of what should have been dawn but it was still POURING rain, flooding and lightning, having to pack up while avoiding getting electrocuted. I thought it was a fluke.

I took them along to the lake last weekend. In a nutshell, the boat we were in had the battery die, I had to jump into the COLD AS HELL water along with 3 kids and pull the damn super motor boat WHILE SWIMMING along to keep it from bashing into the rocks in the cove we were stopping at. THEN no one could get it jump started and we were pretty much marooned for 3 hours. Yes, a three-hour tour.....except we didn't have the Professor along to make cool inventions out of coconuts. We just had to pee in the lake water and survive on my bottle of diet coke, 2 half-drunk gatorades and sock yarn. You have to admit, I was quite the resourceful knitter, pulling out my mini sock-yarn bag and needles to entertain myself. In the midst of this fun, both Jeff and I were trying to grab a rope thrown to us from another boat to pull us to a marina and Jeff accidentally popped me in the eye, causing my glasses to fly off and sink 80+ feet to the muddy bottom of the Lake of the Ozarks. No, I didn't bring contacts along for the weekend, so I was blind and had to drive home squinting my ass off (because of course we took 2 vehicles, this couldn't be easy, now could it?) What else? OH I ended up having a shiner start to show up that night too. It was pretty much gone by morning, but I ended up looking like quite the white-trash lake girl when we went out for Mexican food that night. Shiner, flat hair, squinting, no makeup (forgot to bring it) and wearing a tube top (you can do that when you have half-A cup sized girls). We NEVER go out to eat down there, so I was really prepared.

Even with all the craziness, we had a really fun weekend. We had all four kids, they went exploring back in the cove on the paddleboat of a neighbor and swam and caught fish galore. I sat around and knit my ass off, realizing that it wasn't a fluke that both weekends in the great outdoors with these particular socks random acts of destruction seemed to follow me. I don't think the socks themselves are cursed, they behave quite nicely when left inside in the airconditioning away from bugs and ticks and the like. It makes sense, really. I mean they are koigu, so they feel they should be spoiled. I'm good with that. I think I'll take along some crafty in a good way or trekking next time.

A couple shots from when we were ROCKETING across the lake to the cove far, far away from our lakehouse before we were stranded. Anyone notice how my daughter pulls of the lake girl look with grace and I look like white trash on a stale cracker? *sigh* She is a beauty. Even David (Jeff's oldest boy) is sporting some wild hair in the wind due to his current Beatles-like mullet. It works in 60 mph wind.

You guys rock

Seriously, you guys are the best. Just typing out my freaked out feelings helped and then very nice emails and comments made me feel all shiny happy and loved. Can you tell I'm still on happy pills? Gotta love that percoset.

Turns out the "really big needle" wasn't what I should have been worried about. Doing the sonogram to verify where all the stuff was at showed that the little crap inside the cyst had gone through the wall of that cyst and was eating through another one "in an agressive manner." Nice. So, they did a little more deadening and made a little slice and took out both cysts and some tissue around them as well. It appears to be a fibrous growth, and I had one of these agressive bastards taken out of my other breast about 3 years ago. The dr. doesn't think it looks cancerous at all, but will send it off to pathology just in case. They left a tiny little clip inside to mark the area so if they have to go back in for any reason they'll know just where to go. I thought that was kind of cool. Like bionic boobs. That's what Wonder Woman needed to go with her bracelets, bullet fighting boobs! Pitchoooo! Pitchooo! Pitchooo! (sound effects from her cool bracelets, work with me people I'm hopped up on happy meds)

They didn't have to do any stitches, they used steri-strips and have me wrapped so tight around my ribs and chest that I have NO bumps whatsoever except for the weird one sticking out the lower left side of my left girl.

Jeff did a good job of taking care of my kids last night and went to pick up my pills. I relaxed on the bed against a bunch of pillows and COULDN'T EVEN KNIT because the wiggling of my left arm made things hurt! How much does that suck? One total evening to DO NOTHING but watch tv and knit and I couldn't even KNIT! Then Jeff got home and said it was going to be 2 HOURS before my pain meds would be ready. The local was wearing off and I was starting to HURT! Then I got all weepy because I couldn't go out and eat my guacamole and have my margaritas either. Super Jeff went out and brought back some of the GOOD taquila and mix and made me his own version of pain-killer, aka a very nice margarita with fresh lime juice and salt and everything. Then he went out and got me my pills and put me to bed. He is a good man. (yes, I know you're not supposed to mix alcohol and heavy drugs, I only had about half my margarita and then 2 hours later had my pills.)

I'm able to knit on my socks now and the achiness is much better today. Good thing I'm able to work from home. I've put in about an hour and a half and I'm gonna go take a nap and then work a little more. Seriously, thanks for the good thoughts. I could totally feel them as I was laying there on the table. This whole blogging/internet thing never ceases to amaze me. It's so rare to make friends later in life and to feel that you have all these people that care about you and that you care about and many you've not even met before. That rocks. (see? happy pills. No worries, sarcastic Christine will be back soon.)

Taking a chunk out of my b00b today.

Ok, so I know it's not a big deal. I've had plenty of cysts removed by needle before. Today we're going to take a fibrous mass out of the inside of a cyst. It's totally outpatient, it's totally not a big deal. They don't think it looks cancerous at all. They're not worried. I don't even have to be put under. They'll do a local and then use "the really big needle" It's a big tube needle-thing with teeth much like the alien momma that Sigourney Weaver used to fight. Remember how the little mouth with teeth extended out of the bigger mouth with teeth? Yeah. That's attached to a vacuum and they're gonna just chomp & suck it right out. No big deal. They did something like this about 3 years ago on a walnut-sized lump to do a biopsy to make sure it wasn't anything.

If it's no big deal, how come I'm so freaking scared?

Think yarny, happy b00b thoughts for me please. I'm taking my socks along to do the top ribbing and hopefully calm my ass down. Too bad they don't let you suck down about 4 margaritas before this, huh? Gonna have to settle for yarn as my substitute vice to lean on. crap almighty.

Can the knitting blah's be cured by a yarn sale?

Here's what's going on with my knitting lately. The red is a start on Jeff's mosaic sweater, not too exciting yet, just red. red. red. red. The light green is trying to become its 3rd item. I was creating my own tank top with lace and all kinds of stuff. IN MY HEAD it was gorgeous. On the body not so much. Designer to the stars I am not yet. Now it's becoming the lace paneled tube top from Fitted Knits. I do love Stephanie's designs.

The socks are my first pair of toe up 2sox on 2circs experiment. They've now become my single-white-female stalking socks. I'm totally stealing Gwen's idea for these because the little slip stitch pattern works so well on the crazy multicolored koigu. I couldn't figure out why Gwen's looked so much prettier and daintier than mine. Then I held mine up and realized, duh, Gwen has dainty little feet and I have giant clodhoppers. OH that's why. Ah well, I'm still liking the look of the socks.

Nothing's really getting done around here knit-wise. Nothing's captivated me enough to kick my crazy fast knitting stuff into gear. I'm just kind of blah. Socks? blah. Sweaters? blah. The chickami that had the funky stripe going in the wrong area is still sitting in the bottom of the drawer waiting in blah-land. blah blah blah.

I went wandering through blogs and my old notes of things I wanted to make back a couple of years ago and stumbled on a few oldies but goodies. I want to make a ribby cardi now. I also want to do another clapotis. For now, I'm just working a row or two here and there on whichever item I pick up at the time. I think I'll go play in the stash tonight and see if anything jumps out at me. I've spent too much $$ lately to buy MORE YARN for another new project. Anyone totally captivated by something that sounds like me? I'm looking for suggestions.

OH, I was being a good girl and NOT going to the big anniversary sale at webs. I avoided it and did not think of it. Much like a solar eclipse, I did not look directly at the site, but then you just can't stand the temptation and you glance, ever so swiftly through your little pinhole box you made in 3rd grade.....it can't really burn your eyeballs out of your head, can it? Well, a quick glance at their site has got me thinking....rationalizing.... I don't need any more yarn. But then I saw it. THEY HAVE CASCADE 220 ON FREAKING SALE!!! And good colors. AND the Cascade 220 Superwash. ON SALE! cripes. Sale ends on the 25th, yarn supplies are declining. I'm trying not to buy any. But, you know, cascade 220 would be the perfect yarn for that ribby cardi and a bunch of projects in the Fitted Knits book actually call for it too. Just sayin'. Nope, I don't need any. nope. not really.

maybe just a little. dammit.

Mothers Day ROCKED this year

You know, I'd been laughing at all those commercials for diamonds, electronics, vacations and the like that have been playing for the last 2 weeks for Mother's Day. LAUGHING MY ASS OFF. I kept thinking who the hell gets stuff like that? I'm queen of the half-dead potted plant presents. I have a flowerbox full of those. Nothing wrong with that, heck that's what MY mom gets most years (ok so not half-dead but still it's usually something that causes her to do more work by putting the thing into the ground.) This year my kids did themselves proud. (Actually Jeff helped a bit.) Joey brought home the coolest cutest book that he made for me at school. It's so damn cool that I'll scan it and show it off. Elizabeth and Jeff got me this and it's pretty much been playing 24 hours a day since. No, Jeff made me turn it off before we went to sleep, so probably playing around 15-18 hours a day. LOVING it. Oh how did I ever put away laundry without my own personal stereo system playing my favorite music? I actually sat outside in our screened in porch for 6 hours Sunday night knitting to Big Bad Voo Doo Daddy and Frank Sinatra and Violent Femmes and Garth Brooks and Blues Brothers and Slackstring and on and on and on. It was just beautiful outside and the kids were playing in the back yard and then after I put them to bed I came back out and knit and listened some more. *sigh* good times. I asked Jeff why he did so much this year, when I'm not even the mother of his kids, and he told me it's just because I'm "Ma." That is a good man.

His sweater is slowly getting longer. It's a raglan, so we can hopefully get a good fit on it. It makes me nervous to substitute yarn from hemp to a cotton/tencel blend. And it makes me nervous to be doing my very first attempt at mosaic (2 color) knitting on this first sweater for Jeff, but why should this be any different? Any time I've tried to learn something it's not been done in a classroom situation or by making a swatch or something, oh no. I pick a pattern out for some bigass project and then figure I'd better learn how to do it once I'm half-way done. Good thing I've got people to lean on and learn from around here! Also a good thing that I'm pretty damn anal about my knitting and am not afraid to frog things until they look right.

Are any of you guys doing the stitch N pitch thing? It's all over the nation. Kansas City people, it's June 10th. Our local guild has already had a person coordinate buying of tickets, but I heard that the Studio is buying them in a group also. Knitting, baseball, beer, hotdogs, other knitters, FREE YARN and knitting goodies, what could be better?

You know, it's a good damn thing they don't sell yarn on QVC. If they do, please do NOT tell me. I can't watch that damn channel any more late at night when Jeff's traveling. I did buy this really cute swimsuit, though. Have you seen that It Figures stuff? It holds you IN and pushes you where you need to be and covers stuff up and it's a good thing I'm poor or I'd have also bought this adorable 2 piece swim dress looking thing just to wear around all summer long, probably not even to the pool. I can totally justify buying a $70 swimsuit if it does all this molding stuff and covers the entire butt. I can't justify buying TWO of them, that's serious yarn binging money, honey. This stuff is great because it gives normal and larger sized women stuff that LOOKS GOOD on them. How amazing is that for swimwear? When they gave me my QVC customer number I felt like I was crossing over to the dark side. Lord, my mother can do some serious damage there. This was my very first QVC purchase. I'm really hoping it'll fit. I'm usually not able to fill out the tops on one-pieces, but the tummy is now 38 years old and there's just something not right about bikinis at the city pool on a 38 year old mom. I don't mind being all trashy at the lake, heck I'm the queen of the tank top and cut-offs down there, but it's too hard to hold in my tummy all the time here in public.

Yarn, yarn, everywhere

My hair is behaving itself much better the last few days, thank you for your sympathy. Now it's just flat all over or frizzy all over instead of that one part of my head going nuts. Life's just so exciting around here it's hard to keep up.

Remember the big ass yarn sale? Here's my haul, you can click it to see it bigger:

The bag on the top is 8 balls of burgandy/red rowan calmer and one ball of black that I'm going to use to make my boyfriend sweater. Yes, I know, I know. The curse. Well, I figure if my normal craziness hasn't driven the man away yet a knitted sweater will probably not do it either. Famous last words, huh? *sigh* I'm substituting this stuff for hemp yarn and going to make the cool mosaic manly sweater out of the No Sheep For You! book (can anyone else say that without shouting it like the soup nazi or is it just me?) Next to that is an Elsebeth Lavold book with some cute sweaters for the silky wool I've accumulated lately and a bag of stitch markers. I think I've bought 14 bags of those damn markers and still can never find one when I need it. Below that is seven, YES SEVEN skeins of the most prettiest sock yarn in the land. Andrea is a yarn dyer of such talent that I drool over her stuff. OK, I love my yarn too much for that, I drool in her general direction. The colors, the quality, the value of this yarn is unreal. Apparently I'm over my little hand-painted-variagated hissy fit, no? Can you blame me? How beautiful is that yarn? At the bottom of the pic is my STR sock club yarn, also luscious and fun with SILK in it. Can't wait to get this thing wound up and on some needles! 30% off all fibre is good for me. Knit Wit's rocks.

I've also had a frog party lately. I've got a policy in my frogginess. If a sweater is bad. really bad. nonwearable irritatingly annoyingly bad, it gets put into the bottom of a drawer for a while. It must be taken out, looked at, pulled, tweaked and thought about ways in which to save the sweater and then goes back into the drawer. I even force myself to wear it in public a time or two. If I still can't stand it then it gets frogged. I now knit sweaters that I want to wear. I TRY to pay attention as I'm knitting and realize a bad thing when it gets started and make adjustments or frog a partially completed item. This practice came after some really bad sweaters were knit in their entirety AND seamed AND ends woven in. Frog party before and afters. The patterns weren't the problem, the yarns weren't the problem, the KNITTER was the problem.




Top sweater was the somewhat cowl which I'll probably knit again but this time ACTUALLY TRY THE DAMN THING ON to determine how deep to make the armholes instead of holding it up against my body. The thing has armpits down to my waist and then I ran short on yarn so the whole cowl thing looked really funky too. The tank top is soleil from Knitty, which is a lovely knit but the wide straps on me is NOT a good look. Also I didn't do any measuring of myself to determine my own shaping but blindly followed the pattern so the waist shaping is totally not where my waist is and it's just not flattering at all. Bottom pic is actually NOT an ugly bikini, but the pieces of cleo, a backless halter from Knitty. This one just was me not using any common sense whatsoever. It's designed for ladies WITH a chest. Also to get gauge, I had to DOUBLE worsted weight cotton yarn. Doubled worsted weight cotton yarn made this thing weigh about 10 lbs and though cute in theory, on me it looked like death warmed over. I now probably have enough yarn to make two normal tanks out of this bright color.

Still with me on this long-ass post? wow. Now we've got photos of last night's 1st grade musical performance. woo hoo! I did enjoy the show immensely. Let me just say though, that ONE HOUR AND FIFTY FIVE MINUTES is a titch long to sit still and listen to 1st grade children sing and watch them dance. The cuteness was wearing a bit thin once we passed the hour and a half mark. It was impressive, Joey had 3 costume changes and sang a solo of the Lollipop song, danced in a charleston and also a fifties song as well. His step brothers were moaning and groaning and just thankful that Joey wasn't one of the boys who had to get kissed on the cheek by "GIRLS EEEEEEWWWWWWWWWW" as a few songs ended with a peck on the cheek. Serious stuff for 7 yr olds. Here's a few shots...

Hellooooooooooooo Humidity weird picture day

The scary thing isn't that I went out looking like this all day. The scary thing is that I thought I looked HOT. I left the house with fabulous hair. Not good hair, not flat hair, F.A.B.U.L.O.U.S. Hair. Then humidity happened. Yes, I went all over this damn town and I kept getting all these looks. I thought I was a hottie today, so I worked it. I flaunted and sasheyed a bit. I wiggled. I worked it. hard. I was rockin. Then I got home. Walked by a mirror and about dropped dead. The big, fluffly, bouncy amazingness that was my hair was now totally flat and frizzy with some freaky ass thing sticking out of the side of my head. It's like my bangs from the 80's returned but got stuck on the side of my head.

And, because dryer lint isn't flammable enough......here's what I pulled out of the vent this morning. Yes, those are MATCHSTICKS. A bunch more dropped way down into the dryer after I pulled out the old screen thing. The dryer is almost as old as I am and I expect it to just burst into flames any day now.


Our weekend was a bit wet. We had the CF Walk and TEAM JOEY raised some nice funds and wore obnoxiously bright yellow tie-dyed tshirts, but I have no pictures. They'll come later. GREAT morning. Afternoon was a birthday party for 2 cousins' kids and my uncle Paul. I love Uncle Paul, he's called me "Chris-Ann" with it sounding more like "chriZZZZAN". I LOVE that man. Then we loaded up all four kids and tents and steaks for the grill, wood for the fire, bikes, fishing poles and the like. Headed to Lake Perry outside Topeka. Had a GREAT time until about 10pm. Then the clouds and such started unloading and pretty much we had an entire night of WIND and lightning and rain rain rain and more storms circling around over and over. I had to PEE all damn night, listening to the pouring rain and wind didn't help at all. We were all soaked from drips and streams coming down, one tent blew clean away. (kids' play tent with no kids inside since they all slept with us). Our friends had snapped tent poles, ripped walls and such mud and water and lightning. I think I'm just now getting dry. We packed up camp (aka threw every damn thing we owned on the back of the trailer and shoved into the back of the truck at about 7am in massive lightning standing in water being drenched. I put a kid under a sleeping blanket one at a time and ran them to the trucks/cars and then we just got it all done. Then we drove through beginning floods back through Topeka and past Lawrence and got ourselves home. I did get 3 sock heels done though. Yes, three. You see, I can add. No problems there, I just can't FREAKING READ. My first little toe-up slipped stitch heel was done on about 20 fewer stitches than it needed. nice. Ah well. I frogged it and did it AGAIN after realizing, I'm an idiot. All knitting was done BEFORE the storms hit. I had to reprint my sock pattern when I got back home because mine was soaked clean through in the river that was out tent.



The funny thing was I was TOTALLY freaking out thinking there was going to be a tornado because these storms were SO intense. I kept hearing what sounded like a train in the calm before the storm, thinking it was the twister on its way to blow us right out of there. I was getting ready to wake up Jeff and grab some kids and run for the ditch (which was probably already under water anyway) and then I heard the train's whistle. (for non-midwesterners when you are in the calm between the storms and feel the massive pressure in the air and you hear what sounds like a large train coming at you, GET YOUR BUTT INTO THE BASEMENT because the tornado's on its way.) All well, what's life without a little drama?

OH, and the ticks. Don't forget the ticks. I had one behind a knee and one on my thigh. I didn't even scream. I just mildly freaked out and then grabbed the tweezers. Neither of my kids had any thank God. The only real drama? Jeff's youngest had a tick. um, let's just say it's where a little boy would least like to have a tick. Yes, poor boy had a tick on the dick. Sounds like a bad Dr. Seuss book. Gotta love camping. Even so, it was a really fun weekend.

What is it with me and these b00bs?

Seriously. For something so damn small, they're sure causing a lot of freaking problems. I did actually LEARN SOMETHING from the whole leaky nipple sweater. That's what makes this REALLY piss me off. Using hand-painted, variagated yarns is going to make me insane. I think that's why I knit the grey sleeveless turtleneck in a couple of days. NO THINKING NO WORRYING NO FREAKY B00B ISSUES. cripes.

I pulled out the chickami I'm working on with the ty-dy cotton yarn. I love this yarn, it's very pretty. I got out my other chickami and measured it next to this one in process. I calculated. I added. I thought. I decided where to start the purple band and screwed around with the yarn to get it to start where I THOUGHT would be just below the girls and go in a nice band across and then go back to squirly green/blue stuff. I fuxxed it up. nice. Now the band is directly BELOW the girls. I thought, ok, no worries, I can turn it around and make that the front and do another band of purple right on top of the other one, but then I'll have a band of green/blue through the center of my chest. nice. AND the front and back will be VERY DIFFERENT. I'm a little too anal for that.

So now here's my choices:

#1--> Frog back to below the purple, do another 2 inches of blue/green stuff, have the pretty purple band right where I want it to be.

#2--> Frog to the top of the purple band and make the purple band about twice as wide and finish with blue/green. This would be less frogging but would probably look a llittle strange.

#3--> Put it into the knitting time-out section at the bottom of the cedar chest next to the leaky nipple picovoli sweater. Not think about it. Not make the matching one for my daughter. Can you imagine how insane it will make me to try to figure this crap out TWICE?

#4--> Ignore the whole thing and not make any more damn sweaters out of funky yarn. Make all the freaky handpainted socks, scarves and shawls I want and never, ever, ever make a sweater out of the stuff again. Unless I find something really pretty.....

We're CAMPING in the mud this weekend. Dont cha wish you were going with? AND we have all 4 kids. Yes, we ARE stopping off at the liquor store for some Mike's Hard Limeades, why do you ask?

OH and more b00b issues...Got to go back on the 21st of May to get a small fibroid growth removed. It's growing INSIDE one of my usual goo-filled cysts. It's not concerning and not looking bad (no cancerous worries but they'll test it anyway). It's just growing pretty quick and they want to do it before I have to have surgery to get it removed. I said, ok sure, but if we don't use surgery and it's not liquid (they use a big needle and sonogram to suck out the big liquid cysts every so often), how exactly will you remove it? The doctor, and I swear, said "we use the really big needle." OK, now he said this while holding what I would call a really big ass needle in his hand since he was poking me at the time. Seriously, the thing is as big as his hand. I asked, "just how big of a needle are we talking about?" Apparently the overall contraption is the same big ass size as the current model, this one just has a bigger part that goes into me and chunks out the bad stuff and is hooked up to a vacuum. I know, too much information, sorry people. OWWWWWww They'll at least deaden the area. I'm thinking the little surgery I had before wasn't such a bad idea......happy drugs through an iv where you feel nice and tipsy and don't remember any of it, or numbing needles stuck into your chest and having to be there through the thing. ick. I know I'm lucky. I've had friends go through breast cancer. This is no biggie. At all. It's just when your DOCTOR calls something a really big needle, and it's getting stuck into a tender part of your body, it's not all that much fun.

Shouldn't I at least get to fill out an A-cup to make up for these issues?

Funniest thing I've ever seen combined with the coolest piece of big knitting ever created. You've got to scroll down and see the giant bird. Giant Glove. This link was sent around our local guild yahoo group. Unreal.

Big Ass Yarn Sale Alert!

I have to say that this really is my favorite yarn store in the greater KC area. I love KNIT-WIT. It's where I learned to knit, it's where the seduction first started. That's part of it, but the woman has some seriously amazingly INCREDIBLE yarn. And the sales? HOLY CRAP!

Knit-Wit, Ridgeview & 151st St. in Olathe, KS. Saturday, May 5th at 9am. 30% off all yarn in the store

I'm now not so sad that I missed the yarn crawl, because I can only afford to go insane shopping for yarn a couple of times a year. I figured I've sold about $200 of yarn & needles on destash lately, so maybe.........some pretty pictures will surface soon...

Millionaire for a day

How cool is that? Don't they look like twins? My daughter is the redhead in pigtails and pink shirt. The other one is her friend from the other 4th grade class. Their names were drawn to be millionaires for a day with a local bank promotion and it goes along with their whole learn to save as kids program they're learning about at school. They got to split one day's interest on a million dollars and open savings accounts $82.16 each, ride a limo to the bank and then swing by and pick up pizzas for the whole grade.

Whole lotta knitting gonna go on later today. I'm meeting Chery for knitting at lunch and the girls for knitting tonight!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO TERI!!! Go on over and tell her Happy Birthday too! She's pretty much the reason I'm the crazy ass knitter and blogger that I am. Ok, so not the crazy part. That was from years in the making and I can't put the blame for that on her, but the KNITTING part. She was inspirational enough and just pushy enough to tell me "of COURSE you can do that. Here, let me show you...." for whatever lame thing that was bothering me long, long ago. I would casually drop by an old Wed. night or Thurs. night knitting group once every few months and she just welcomed me like I was part of the group immediately each time. She also totally rocks as a knitter and as a human being. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!