My weekend fun (LONG LONG version, sorry!)

WARNING-->this is quite possibly the longest post I've ever written, it goes on FOREVER and has no real point...hey, this is now another entry in my nano with a few modifications....read only if you have a lot of time to kill and nothing to do!

Since it's been so long since I had a weekend that had more social activities for myself than for my kids, I thought I'd share! OK, it wasn't a wild weekend on any other measurement scale, but I'm going to take what I can get and I really had a good time!

Friday, 5:01, hit the road, picked up my son & was on the way to get my daughter at about 5:20. Got a phone call that at 5:10, my little girl "beat up one of the boys in after-care". (I'm not one of those parents who think their children are angels and can do no wrong, but she's absolutely the last person in the world who would hit someone.) When I asked for details the girl said she "pushed him, kicked him in the head and he ended up with a large bump and will have to go to the doctor's and she LIED about it." I made sure it was MY daughter and the boy she supposedly beat the crap out of was a lot bigger than her and one of her friends, so it totally did not make sense. Apparently they thought she was lying because when they said "Why did you kick him in the head and beat him up?" and she said "I didn't beat him up, I just pushed him off me." When I got there it seemed the after-care program director and both of her assistant helpers had all left at 5pm and the only ones left were the two high school girls who are pretty much incompetent. After talking with my daughter and calling the mother of the little boy it turned out that the kids were all crowded in together on the mats watching a movie and they bumped each other, another boy shoved this one onto her, Beth got hit in the shins and had a few little bruises, so she pushed the boy off her and he stood up, tripped and fell backwards over another kid, hitting his head on the ground. The mom said he didn't even have a bump or anything and not to worry about it. SO my daughter was the FIRST one suspended out of the program and I had to get creative about getting her to & from school. Man, that's a phone call I didn't ever think I'd have to make...."sorry my daughter beat up your son...." HAH. OK, I have to admit, a little part of me was like "YEAH!" because she is just learning to stand up for herself if someone picks on her or her friends.

After we got everyone all calm and happy at home and called the mom and such, Friday night was pretty much ready for bath & snacks & bed for kiddos and I knitted this new satanic yarn I bought from the LYS on my bday. I am making a modified funky boob tube, and it's the most HORRIBLE stuff to start on circular needles, but once it gets going, it's not too bad. I knitted, frogged, knitted, frogged, said the HELL with this BIRTHDAY yarn crap and got a glass of wine. It called to me....."I'll be nice, knit me, please, knit me" So after another glass of wine and laughing on the phone about my daugher aka "bruiser" decided to give it another go. I was cruising on the boob tube, had about 8" done, it's such a simple pattern and really moves.....realized I screwed up and was supposed to do plain ol stockinette for the first 8" and not start the increase pattern until AFTER the first 8" were done....YUP, I'd been just increasing my little heart out and it was not fixable....so the whole damn thing was frogged again. I was actually trying to get it done to wear out on Sat. night, but that didn't quite work. So, got myself a diet coke (I know, it was after midnight and I'm popping caffiene before bed) typed about 1300 words on the never-going-to-get-to-50,000 nanowrimo thing and went to bed.

Sat. I had about 4 people I hadn't talked with in months call to say hello and catch up. Man, the best friends are those you can talk to while cleaning toilets! I got the kids to help clean the house as it was getting a bit frightening! We went garage-saling in the am and had fun, found a few treasures (aka CRAP) that the kids couldn't live without and mostly wandered around in the cold air. I loved watching the munchkins decide on their purchases...they have to take their own quarters & when they're out, they're out. Joey's a monster when it comes to wheeling & dealing....he goes up with a toy marked $2 and ends up using his big-eyes-looking-sad bit and comes back after spending a quarter. The kid's got talent. Beth uses him now. She'll send him up with a girly thing and he'll say "I really want to buy this for my sister, can I use this?", hand her a couple quarters and if that doesn't work, he HUGS them. What little old lady can resist a spiky-headed-boy that hugs? MAN I have to act really interested in some piece of crap on the lawn to observe and not look like I'm pimping my kids.

Went to Huyen's baby shower while mom watched the kids. There's nothing more fun than hanging out with about 50 asians! My wild little group is starting to mellow out. My friend Alison got me adopted into this big international group and I've gone from being that "tall white chic" (I'm actually only 5 foot 7", but most of my friends are barely 5 foot, so I'm like a giant-woman) they brought along for fun, kind of a fringe-friend, to being invited into these women's and their friends' lives. It's wierd. When you are a kid, you make new friends all the time. When we go to college, we make life-friends and then we grow up and just end up with aquaintances. I made a resolution to live more of my life and be open to making friends a few years ago and I ended up meeting Russell & Alison right about then. Since then I've added other special people to my life and it's really amazing....

OK, enough touchy-feely-crap, back to the story....ANYWAY, Huyen was one of the girls I went to chicago with over July 4th weekend (pictures on my links). She's about the cutest little preggo girl! I was cracking up because there were about 4 white people, a few Indians and a ton of asians. I've never seen so many freaking cameras in my life, it was like the biggest stereotype of all, but I SWEAR I'm in about 45 pics and I wasn't the momma-to-be! She must be in over 100. I was cracking up. They also EAT very well and DRINK a bit too. I was a good girl and just ate veggies & fruit and no drinks. The group's parties seem to start in the afternoon and usually end up around 2am. They wanted me to go out for my bday that night, but I had a hot date, so couldn't. They said to not make lunch plans for the next day. I can't explain it, but it's so amazing to just be pulled into this neat group of women! It makes me all happy & gushy inside. OH, and of course there's one old white guy (the daddy-to-be's father) who comes to ask for my # before I leave....WHAT IS THIS FREAKY OLD GUY MOJO I'M WORKING NOW?????????? He's rich as snot, about 60 and a slight alcoholic. woo. baby. At least he didn't resemble Kenny Rogers, that's a plus as most of the men I attact are dead ringers for the country star.

TIRED OF READING YET???

Sat afternoon I ran home, got the kids, went to get dvd's for the new dvd/vcr player I got from mom & dad and got the kids set for my super-sitter, Michael. Michael's one of my hundreds of cousins (I'm catholic, what can I say?) His big sister was one of my best friends when we were growing up and she ended up dying of cervical cancer in her early 20's. Michael's kind of an adopted baby brother who looks like a linebacker. He's in KC now going to college at DeVry. He comes over about every other weekend and the kids love him. I feed him and pay him and we hang out and catch up and I pick on him like Erin would have done. It's a good setup for all as he's kind but also big & tough and a good male role model for Joey too. He got there and I hit the ROAD. Wore a black scoop-neck top w/jeans and heels and my cool wild-mix skinny scarf wrapped around my neck about 5 times, GREAT hair, NO zits and I was a little hotty. Headed out to Argosy casino and met my old friend Bill there. He found out it was my bday weekend from another friend and decided we'd live it up. Bill could well have been my "bob" (my wild aunt Dot from CA has a gentleman friend who is my goal for what I want in a life partner. He's amazing, sweet, funny, cute and has his own damn life and his own damn job and own damn house and comes over when she wants him to and goes away when she wants too...it works for both of them. I've decided I'm not getting married again, but my goal is to find a friend/lover/partner when I'm in my 50's or 60's and if not that's ok too) He's moving to Hilton Head, SC to run a bowling center, he's now a district manager for about 18 centers in the area. We decided we like to hang out, there's an attraction, (NO HE'S NOT A BOWLER, so NONE OF MY OLD FRIENDS GIVE ME ANY CRAP HERE--My ex-hubby was a professional bowler and the 2nd hubby that only lasted 6 months after marriage because he was a crazy M.F. was also a bowler and I swore a blood oath that I would not marry any more bowlers) SORRY, back to the LONG-ASS version of my life....

DAMN I'm getting tired of typing!

So, we go in and wander past the restaurants and decide on the Journey, this really nice (and expensive) steak restaurant. I ate EVERYTHING and almost barfed. I'm not one of those dainty little pick at a salad on a date kind of chics. If there's food, and it's good and especially if it's expensive, I'm EATING it baby. So, we both get salads, bread, steak, mashed potatoes that were like HEAVEN and green beans that were amazing....and there was NOTHING left on my plate....how scary is that? We also downed a bottle of shiraz wine and were just talking and telling stories, he's lived the most amazing life. I am trying to get him to start a blog just recording different things he's done as a record. He decides since it's my bday, we've got to get dessert. I very daintilly (is that a word?) say I may barf on the table if I force any further food into my body....and he says just take a taste of mine....and he orders this chocolate fudge cake satanic godiva chocolately thing that I could have DIED it was so freaking good AND a piece of strawberry/raspberry/cheesecake divine thing....of course I packed in about half of those as well. After we finished the wine, I rolled myself out of the restaurant and we wandered over to the craps table.

Bill gave me a $100 bill to use, and I said "I'm not using your stinking money" and he said whatever we make we'll spend. So, since my fingers are getting tired here, I'll just say I lived on that $100 all night long. The only time I'd tried craps I'd lost all my $$ in about 15 minutes and didn't have a clue why. THIS time I was QUEEN of the table. It was a blast. The funny part was Bill threw down at least 4 more $100 bills. I kept saying "you want some of my money?" but you can't share chips at the table and he wouldn't hear of it. (He's also loaded and has no kids and no real demands so I figured he's a big boy). At one point I had the two trays in front of me FILLED with chips...counted $680-something at one point...but we kept playing. After about 2 1/2 hours there we moved on to roulette. I left the table with $450 or so and he got up to $300 in chips, so overall we were a bit up. I hate roulette, but we had a blast. We sat next to the funniest girl. She was with this tough biker-guy. She talked like a cartoon character from the 30's...that high pitched baby doll voice, and had BIG ol boobies sticking out of this top that had one little button hanging on between them. She also jumped up & down whenever she did anything good or bad, so it was quite a sight. Then she looks down at her boobies and says to me, "Do you like them? They're new!" And I say, they're lovely. Bill elbows me and whispers "Are you seriously out at a casino talking about a woman's new breasts?" The other guys are cracking up at the table. Then I see she's talking about the brooch or pin things she's got on the top just below the one button that's straining to keep these little basketballs in place. I laughed until I snorted.

So, we end up telling stories, laughing, having fun until I figure I'd better get home and we go out to the valet around 2am. I get a very nice kiss goodnight and head off into the night, listening to my Violent Femmes cd loud with all the windows down and the butt-heater in my seat on high and in a very nice mood.

The kiddo's wake up at about 6:30 am, so momma's moving a little slow...they run & I stagger downstairs and get breakfast, then lay on the couch while the munchkins entertain themselves by building an obstacle course of blocks, chairs, giant spongebob pillow, sleeping bags and the like. Make my way to the shower and Phuong and Huyen call about lunch. We get moving and head to the Elephant Bar (very good food) and meet up for lunch for my bday! The kids shared a meal and I ate until I was going to pop AGAIN, inhaled this wonderful chicken chinese thing. And they gave me PRESENTS! I was just so touched that these new friends remembered my bday, and then that they scheduled a big lunch for me and PRESENTS! I got some yummy perfume (with comments that they're tired of my old-lady Elizabeth Arden Red Door that I've worn for years), 3 silver picture frames and a cute necklace & earrings set that looks like me! We ate a bunch, talked a lot and of course many more photos were taken! (I don't even bring a camera anymore to anything as I know these girls will have it covered!)

Then we run to Joey's friend's bday party. It was a dress-up princess party with about 25 girls and 4 boys. They stuck a note on Joey's card that he could dress like a prince or a king if he wanted to. We don't have a whole lot of king-material, so we did the batman cape and a paper crown. We got to princess alley and saw a crowd of cinderellas, snow whites, sleeping beauties and tinkerbells (when did she become a princess?) and Joey and the other little guys with their capes. Joey got rid of the paper crown and put up the batman hood w/eyes and pointy ears and was running around the room with his arms out like he was flying....chaos. But they had a blast, ended up getting both kids' faces painted and I very politely said no thanks on the bday cake as I could not possibly put any more food into my body.

Sunday evening I got my presents from the kids. Beth had made a beautiful drawing of she & I & Joey playing on the swings and Joey made me a heart and wrote his name in it.

My life was all stressful and kind of getting to me and I wasn't planning on doing anything for my bday. I ended up having the nicest weekend in a long time. Friday I'm going out with some other friends for a belated bday party and am going to try to drag Russell along too! I got nice emails & thoughts from my new blogger friends and I'm just a happy little camper. I think I'll plan on not celebrating again next year and see if I can do all this again!

My tantrum's over now

Well, I'm feeling better now. I've got Nachos Bell Grande and am so hungry I might just lick the nacho cheese off the lid too.

Sorry about the old ranting & raving here about the dungeon. I hate when people complain over & over and don't do anything to change the situation. I'm working on changes, but it's taking a bit longer than anticipated. Now I'm just trying to walk & talk like a normal adult person and not go crazy. Who needs a therapist when you have a blog? It's my sanity-saver.

fyi still no talk, bring it on. I'm ready.

Taking bets on whether I lose my job today

It's a good thing I had a damn good weekend, because this am is not too whoopy. Actually, I'm not even upset. It's getting personal. After my last "talk" with the local boss I was told he knows it's not really my fault that I'm a single mother and that I have a sick child and they sympathize... Good thing I know it's not my fault I've got no morals and a few gay friends and GASP democratic-views.....

ANYWAY, the whole circle of secrecy thing where no one ever gives 2 weeks or gets 2 weeks' notice here in the dungeon is starting up again..whispers, shocked looks, etc. You're gone at 4:45pm the last day of the pay period so they don't have to cut a partial check for a 1/2 day or 2 days or something. Well, this afternoon's the last day of this pay period (we don't get paid until the day AFTER the 15th and the day AFTER the last day of the month). I have to take a half-day Wednesday am to get trained on Joey's new fangled VEST thing that's his air clearance/shake the crap out of him/new plan to help him get the congestion out of his sinuses & lungs. I have to be trained by the company's representative or blue cross won't pay for the $16,000 cost of the machine. I recently sent a very appropriate, professional email to the owners & cc: the management team (me, my buddy & the controller) about how I'm trying to minimize any time lost and I appreciate that they are running a business and to let me know if they would consider me working part time or whatever I can during this time that my son is ill or if not, let me know and I would be happy to train any replacement they deem necessary. I have not heard word one in response to my email, no acknowledgement whatsoever.

My father took Joey to work Friday so I didn't have to miss any time, etc. I said this am in the big Monday Meeting that my daughter isn't able to go to the after-care program today so I have to pick her up at 3:00. I could either take my lunch then, bring her back to the office for one hour between 4 and 5 or I could leave early. Last time I had to bring a child to the office for an hour it caused a stink because Miss Hateful complained about me getting "special preferential treatment". (I know, it's redundant, but she's not that bright.) The last time ended up with a "little talk" from the local boss explaining how I needed to try harder to act just like everyone else and the fact that I was salary and management and required to work more than 40 hours ANYWAY didn't matter. I just had to "avoid the appearance of special, preferential treatment." So, instead of saying take the afternoon off or bring her in, he looked at me with the patented fatherly "I'm disappointed in you" look and said "we'll discuss it later, just you and I in my office" and kind of did this sigh thing. I'm telling you, I'm 36 freaking years old and not putting up with this crap. There's no FMLA (family medical leave act) applicable here as we're too small of a company. Basically the rules of government agencies and any other normalcy do not apply. I'm surprised we haven't started floating around in the air and that the law of gravity still works down here.

SO, my original thought was they would keep me until the old analyst/computer guru could come in and train someone else. He's now teaching school, so the plan was probably wait until summer originally, then I've had to miss a few half-days and had 3 sick days in the last month, so it was probably pushed to Xmas vacation. NOW, scandal of scandals, I'm planning on taking a few hours off. You know, THIS is why I explained to the big bosses in person last time they were here AND in email 2 weeks ago that though we were hoping for better times, I could well need more time off here and there. I am making sacrifices where I can and my family is helping as well, but that's all I've got buster.

Haven't heard word one about our "talk" yet. It's about lunch time. I'm leaving at 2:30 to get Beth and if I haven't had a talk before then, tough. Any bets that my "talk" will end up with me hitting the road? I think the newest plan was the big bosses having a "talk" next week when they get here and basically giving me an ultimatum of not missing any more work or I'm gone, but now I'm thinking it could be today. We'll see. Might have a lot more time on my hands. Any bets?

OK, two and a half hours later update --> It sounds like the big bosses are wanting to work with me, it's just the local one I'm upsetting. Guess I'll be down here for a while longer... Still haven't had my talk yet, but the gossip highway is like being back in high school. I was pretty good at keeping up with who liked who and who didn't and all that, so those skills are coming in handy years later. Who would've thought the 2 things I'd use most that I learned in high school would be algebra and the gossip grapevine?

I will write later about my great weekend and how I'm going mary-kate-anorexic for a couple of days to make up for all the food my friends fed me! I may be pissy, but I'm also pretty lucky to have good people in my life.

Happy Birthday to Me

"Few people know how to be old."
--La Rochefoucauld (1613-1680)

I think I've got a pretty good idea. 36 years today. I have now crossed over to the next color in the button stage, you know the one where you have to give your age range, now I'm a 36-50 woman. The day started with a card full of $$ from mom & dad. They always know just my size! Thank God for parents that love me. Had to go get my drivers license renewed, $22 for a piece of paper and a guy to point at signs posted along the counter telling me they'll mail my new license in 2-4 weeks. He apparently was tired of having to actually talk to people, so he'd point. I said "hi" and he just looked at me. He pointed at the paper saying to stand in front of the blue sheet, never said "smile" or anything. I smiled for the pic, paid my $22, said "thanks, have a great afternoon" and he pointed to the taped paper stating I was now completed with my experience at the DMV. How did they ever get the reputation of being unfriendly??? hmmm

BUT guess what's a few doors down from the DMV????? You guessed it, KNIT WITS and I had my bday $$ burning a hole in my pocket next to the paper version of my license so I went in JUST FOR A LOOK-SEE....and got some goodies!!! I'll add pics later, but I made myself leave the bag in the car because I know I'd be tempted to sit here reading & dreaming & petting my new yarn instead of getting any work done around here. Going to make a modified version of the boob tube out of this strange new yarn and I'm gonna be a hottie still even without making that damn sexy tank I gave up on....maybe after my knit-along-ribbon tank I'm starting Monday, I can give that tank a try again.

One good point of the day--> Joey was feeling better today, but still coughing like an 80 yr old smoker, so Grandpa Joe took him to work with him for the day. I don't know who was more excited, big Joe or little Joe. My dad had his laptop bag and Joey had his bob-the-builder backpack walking hand in hand. Wish I would've got a picture of that.

2nd good point of the day --> I had FABULOUS hair today and was all sad because even though I'm sure Amanda appreciates good hair days, sharing it with my fellow dungeon-mates is not really a good use of those RARE fabulouso days! I'm heading out on the town tomorrow night with an old friend and I'll probably look like a damned hobochic, but I took quite possibly my best ever driver's license picture (even with crooked glasses).

STRANGE note of the day--> What is it about a woman's 36th birthday that brings out the crazies??? Are we exceptionally vulnerable now or something?? I got calls from all the nutjobs that were trying to be my lover-boi...Kenny Rogers' twin sent a card and $20, wierd, but hey, I'm poor I'll take it....(I'm already going to hell anyway and Mark said I can share his & Russell's handbasket to Heck on the trip).....the Italian Stallion called to see if I wanted dinner at Cascone's, a movie and then drinks at the Cigar Box downtown (he was a pleasant diversion, but kind of strange so I said maybe in a week or two, hey I eat GREAT with him, have fun, he's a great dancer and is SO working that Italian/power/sexy/whatever it is that it's easy to ignore the fact that he's NOT good boyfriend material, but is a LOT of fun to hang out with--made sure he's ok with the just-dating-for-fun thing so I figure it's ok)....creepy Sprint executive/old mentor guy called saying he missed me and wanted to get together and needed advice on his sexual harrassment hearing in the company (ICK...nope)....Young Boi (25 yrs) is a friend I've flirted with off & on for a few years and we have one of those strange FWP relationships called to see if I had plans (hadn't heard from him in about 3 months)....and an old friend called and I said OK to going out on the town with him. (he's moving to Hilton Head, SC in a few weeks so I've got a really nice place to plan a weekend away in the future!) I think it's strange that single men remember your bday but as soon as you marry a guy he forgets it. wierd.

The Chubby Chronicles

"Well-behaved women rarely make history."
--Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

The world needs a few more quotes, ok, maybe just I do. ANYWAY, blog is now BORING, so 0ne of my new goals is snazzing things up, adding better and more recent pics and all that. I'll be working on that this weekend.

Knitting update-->completed Auntie's scarf! Woo Hoo, get to wrap it up for xmas....I love wrapping gifts almost as much as I love ripping them open! My daughter loved the soft & fuzzy red/orange scarf I gave her for part of her bday present. I made one for her school's auction to go with a gift certificate to the LYS and she was begging for one.

Writing update, I FINALLY have a few words, but what was I thinking???? 50,000 words???? It's supposed to be fiction, and it pretty much has become a chick-lit kind of thing posed as an extended blog with the main character a 36 yr old red headed single momma of 2 redheaded kiddos who tries to use these new addictions of knitting & blogging to figure out who she is, where she fits into the world, and bitch about people who piss her off like crazies in the dungeon....IT IS TOO FICTION, I added a few details here & there. The sad thing is that I was most inspired last night on the chapter called The Chubby Chronicles.

The gist of the chub chrons is my getting tired of being chubby tirade. It started with my diet of yesterday....breakfast was a green&white hot tea (healthy) followed by 2 homemade chocolate chip cookies (hey, my buddie got a new stand mixer and it would have been rude to resist, ok, they were GREAT and I wanted them in my tummy and was doing good to only have 2), lunch was 2 peanut-butter chocolate chip granola bars & a diet coke, dinner a few bites of some spicy nasty expensive dinner at the Cheesecake Factory and you guessed what the evening snack was, CHEESECAKE and I mean good CHEESECAKE with strawberries and oozing stuff.... Yup, the day started with grand illusions of healthiness and slimness and was just shot to hell. Well, the combination of those closet ghosts shrinking all my pants and my lovely diet and no-exercise plan have worked that even the duck walk isn't working on the jeans any more. I found myself knitting on the couch with my pants unzipped. WHAT IS THAT??? Al Bundy knitting? I might as well buy myself a trailer, wear the so-tight-jeans-we're-scared-they're-gonna-bust look that is only completed by a torn concert tshirt and a butterfly ankle bracelet (except my damn ankles are too tight for that part of white trash crap anyway) and date an unemployed guy named Trevor.

I FORCED myself back onto the treadmill...the one that not too long ago I was cranking out 3 miles jogging/day and was only 5 pounds from the "ideal weight" for my body type....then was drastically derailed by all things chocolate and sitting on my butt... Made it walking fast for 1 mile, was all inspired and pissed off and stalked around the basement doing 50 walking lunges (actually 100, but you don't get to count each leg individually as that apparently pisses off the slim thigh goddesses and they add extra cellulite when you try that). I lived through 25 counter pushups (I'm a wimp, standing up and leaning against the kitchen sink is as good as this chic gets so far--regular pushups I can do 2). As a reward I allowed myself to knit for one hour and then sat to type and type and type about the "new plan" for the "new body". We'll see.

My biggest accomplishment of the day was walking by the chocolate zingers package in the QuickTrip that was calling my name.....it even had the extra free zinger in the bonus package, but I said NO.

Some people strive for world peace, some for world domination, I strive to walk past a bag of zingers. I think it takes about the same amount of effort.

I know the election's over, but I couldn't help myself

This one was just too good. I am really over the election, really. I am just still pissed. Found this one on a blog that I think found it on Queer Joe's Blog.



Apparently the new plan for the next 4 years is to screw the environment. I KNEW there were issues for the big election, we just didn't SEE any but our lack of morals and "gotta have a Texan bad-ass to protect us".

Republicans all excited about drilling for oil in Alaska's last few preserves.

You know, I used to be a nice little Johnson County republican girl...then I went to college and learned a few things...then I became an independent. I liked Reagan, I like Elizabeth Dole, Alf Landon (can't remember if he was a democrat or not but I liked him), but you know, I've had about enough. I've been pushed over the edge and have become a right-wing liberal and am a bit proud of it. scary what it can all do to you, isn't it?

CUTE free felted purse pattern from KnitChic

Found the CUTEST new free purse pattern on Knit Chic's blog: Trapezoid Clutch. DOING this one with the rest of the noro kureyon yarn I've got and am making myself finish a few things BEFORE starting it!

Knitting Update--> I am a true knitress. I swear it's almost scary when you have a few hours to kill and have to sit around in waiting rooms. I have the boring tank almost DONE now. I can't WAIT to start our cool Knit Along Tank! I completed the back last week and was all proud of myself, yesterday I have the front done up to the point of decreasing for the armhole shaping. woo hoo. I still think it's ugly and plain, but it's my first official garmet I'm knitting so I'm wearing it ANYWAY. Auntie's scarf is almost done and I sewed the handles to the 2 party purses and they're ready to felt. I'm a knitting MACHINE baby! Next is the FUN new trapezoid clutch purse and then my knit along tank!

Happy Birthday to my now 8 year old daughter! Seen in her new poncho to the right. She went to school wearing a new dress and feeling all sassy! We didn't make it to the nail shop for matching "sessy toes" yet, so hope to do that this weekend. Does it ever frighten anyone else when they see their kids turning out a LOT like them? I don't know if the world can handle my two little ones...We'll see. She was all excited also because she got to do her first big report for school. We now know ALL about the state of Louisiana and have a big-ass thick poster board stand full of state goodies. She was like "MOM, can you BELIEVE it? I got to do my first book report last month and NOW I get to do a REAL state report!" I'm thinking, girl, enjoy this enthusiasm while you can...I can see a few years down the road...Me-"have you got your report done yet?" Beth-"MOOOOOOMMMMMM, give it a rest, wontya?" Ah well it's just fun now!

Joey update--> First, thanks for all the prayers & "you go girl" and other support! We had a very productive day at the CF clinic yesterday. Still don't exactly know what will make my little guy feel better, but at least now we have a PLAN of some kind. I got an apology from the cf coordinator about the treatment at the ER last Friday night. I still get pissed when I think about it..."Bring him back if you get concerned"....Don't you think I was a bit freaking CONCERNED in the first place??? ALSO, why are all the best children's hospitals in the WORST neighborhoods??? I was so scared I'd get mugged trying to get the little guy back out to the car. Apparently the doctor covering the CF calls last weekend is the same one I've had conflicts with in the past. She is no longer part of Joey's cf team. Don't mess with momma! This doctor chic is a pulmonologist, but mostly works with infectious diseases and helps cover after-hours for the CF team. I asked what do we do the next time we're in the ER and she's the covering dr? and they put a note on the computer records that they're to call one of a list of people in the CF team instead. YEAH.

They did lots of tests & things and he's on a few more med's to help cut down on the amount of crud in his sinuses and now we're starting the Vest. In a nutshell, it's $16,000 (yes, the price of a freaking CAR) but should hopefully get covered by insurance or a foundation that helps people that get denied. Basically, it costs as much as a car to combine a bunch of velcro, two air tubes and an air pump (ok I'm sure there are some research and FDA approval fees in there somewhere, but come on, $16 freaking thousand???). Officially it's a pulmonology clearance tool that uses pulses of air to break up the crud in the kids' lungs & bodies. It basically hooks two air vents into a vest that shakes the crap out of the kid. Joey tried it in the clinic and tried to sing "bob the builder...can we fix it...bob the builder...yes we can" while his little voice was shaking so badly it was freaky. I was cracking up. I know it's serious but GDangit it was kind of funny too. We'll see. He's feeling a little better, and still in preschool, just coughs a lot and doesn't eat much.

more examples of how knitting = smut

OK, I gotta admit it, I love these dang retro pics!

Don't they look good? Hopefully they're not waiting for 3 three guys:


and the knitting smut for the day: (This one looks like a bad day in the wardrobe-room for the porn shoot)


OK, life updates..

My son Joey's been off all antibiotics for a week and a half and isn't feeling too whoopy. (Joey's got Cystic Fibrosis--a lung & digestion disease with chronic sinus problems too.) After he's been not eating well, coughing till he barfs up gross stuff and basically looking like a sick little kid instead of the normal hyper-active obnoxious 4 1/2 year old boy he should be and no one seemed particularly worried. "Bring him back if you get concerned" was what the ER at Children's Mercy told me last Friday night. Call me crazy, but I was a bit freaking "concerned" which is why we were THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE.

Good thing for knitting. I grabbed my aunt's scarf and got about another 8" done. It's almost ready to wrap up for xmas. It also kept me from hitting a young dr in training that was explaining how my son really might not be sick...it could all be in my mind since I wasn't a trained medical doctor like her (and she looked like a damn barbie all cute & skinny too!)...of course, I did think of using one of the sz 9 needles as a weapon, but figured, hey they were my only pair of rosewood needles and I liked them so all in all they kept me out of trouble. Apparently once I got the CF team to admit the basic policy now seemed to be wait until the kid is so sick he can't function and THEN we might do something, that wasn't really in his best interest, and we're going in tomorrow morning for a workup on blood, xrays, PFT's (pulmunary function tests) and other fun stuff.

I really have the utmost respect for the medical establishment and am very lucky to have Children's Mercy here in KC, but lately it's gone from "here's our healthiest little CF kid, let's do everything in our power to keep him that way" to "go away until he's sicker and then we'll talk". Momma's a little too tough to get pushed off so easily...

On the upside, since I was home this weekend and not out catting about, I got some serious knitting done. I finished the back of my tank I started a LONG time ago from the Yarn Girls' Guide to Knitting, and was so proud of this pretty little thing I walked around the house with it hanging on my shirt to see what it looks like. Yup, I'm a dork. I'm bringing Angie's scarf along tomorrow for all the waiting around and hope to get it DONE, ready to do my fun knitalong tank with Nyxxie!

Retro Knitting Pics TOO FUNNY!

As I was browsing my collection of blogs I keep up with, I stumbled on Justinland's entry about these amazing retro knitting pics that are a SCREAM! I'm planning on sticking a few in with the next few posts. They're called "Hand Knits for Young Moderns" and I swear I had too much fun looking at these instead of getting work done!

First, here's my aunt's scarf I'm working on and the not yet felted smaller version of the party bag in a more muted burgandy/black mix of Noro Kureon. I've just finished 2 of them, but still have to sew the handles on and felt.




I think they used smut to sell knitting patterns in the 60's...check out the grilled hot dogs and this chic's little mouth expression...scary!

more knitting smut...

I'm better now

Sorry about the bitchy last post! Got it out of my system and am feeling much better. Last night I ran out to apply for some stupid life insurance thing where I had to pee in a cup & give a TON of blood for them to make sure I'm not about to die yet. Too much fun. Did get some reading done, I'd picked up a few magazines at Borders earlier in the week and hadn't had a chance to sit & read yet...Vogue knitting Holiday issue...Knitting (from England) LOTS of cool articles, barely started this one yet and LOVE it...Creative Knitting Nov. 2004. seems to have lots of kids' patterns that don't look too tough.

Got home and was feeling much more at peace with the world, put the kiddos to bed, sat and finished all the i-cords on the 2 party purses I'm going to felt that I stitched out of Noro Kureyon yarn (my new favorite), wasn't feeling up to weaving in ends & sewing straps, etc, so picked up the scarf I'm making for my aunt and got about 6 more inches done on it. Went to bed kind of early, pretty peaceful evening overall.

Back in the dungeon, same people, same problems, but really don't care any more.

A catty little post today

SO, Miss Hateful has almost gotten her wish, no not her REAL wish of me dropping dead after begging the powers-that-be to give her MY job...no, but she did FINALLY piss me off today. I am usually able to laugh at her petty little stomping, cussing, lying, whining etc. crap that I deal with, but for some reason I just couldn't take it any more. After a particularly frustrating exchange where I actually said her name, and asked her a question politely in a matter a CLIENT needed resolved(because I, being a member of the human race, am able to communicate in a professional manner at work) and the stupid chic looked at me blankly across the room, ignored the fact that I existed and went back to staring at the stupid fax machine without any comment whatsoever. I know, I know, I'm above it. I normally smile sweetly at her because it seems to drive her nuts, but I'd had it. I calmly left, went back to my parner-in-crime, said "I need a diet coke RIGHT NOW" and left without pulling out any of my hair. After venting and standing in the freezing rain, I was able to make it back down to the dungeon to deal with the crazies... When I said I was feeling like all I wanted to do was walk across that room and hit the witch upside the head, we laughed because we realized she would kick the crap out of both of us. Growing up in a world where people are polite, communicate their frustration with WORDS is a whole different world than growing up head tramp of the trailer park. ooch was that a little catty? meow.

One positive note, Amanda completed her first-ever knitting at lunch! She now has about 3 rows of a very cute scarf started and I'm so excited for her!! Woo Hoo Girl!

well CRAP

Short note today. Caught a "case of the barfs" as my daughter put it on Monday afternoon, went home with a headache at noon thinking I'd have a peaceful nap that afternoon and ended up losing about 4 pounds NOT the good way. ick. Tues I felt better, but figured I'd better not bring the sick germs in (even though I now think it was something I ate as I felt immediately better and no chills/aches or other stuff that goes with the flu.) SO I went out to the LYS for 2 hours, had a ball, ran a bunch of errands, took a nap, read a book, thoroughly enjoyed myself. Did NO blogging or anything else. Catching up soon.

Knit-Along tank top will start on Nov 15th! Woo hoo! Email me or leave a comment here to sign up. I'll have more details soon. Click the "free patterns" link in the side column to see a pic of the tank. Easy, fun, yeah!

My one political note: CRAP. Ah well, at least my boss is now happy...giddy, actually.

I'm starting a tank top KNIT ALONG!

I don't exactly know HOW to start a knit-along, but I want to try! Nyxxie and I are game, any other takers out there??? We're going to make the Lion Brand Incredible Ribbon Top (CUTE and easy tank top) and are going to slug through together. I'll check some forums and see what it takes to start a little KNIT ALONG where we can post progress, cuss, show pics and eventually all be hot, sexy mamma's in our new knitted tanks! Here's the pic:

New felted bag on its way

Major accomplishment of last night:
YEAH for me! I felt like such the experienced knitter chick last night. I sat down at about 8:30pm after both kiddos fell asleep, watched a little sex in the city, started another felted party bag with a few variations/experiment by me and got the entire body knitted! Tonight I hope to get the icord straps done and MAYBE even sew it together ready for felting. If not, I hope to crank out a few more and do some serious felting this weekend!! It took much less Noro Kureyon than last time, so I either screwed up last time or this time, we'll have to see how it turns out to be sure. BUT I loved it. I'll post pics this weekend. I couldn't believe the sense of accomplishment I felt before heading off to bed. Wish life were that simple sometimes...

OK, so now G.W. is so sure of himself that he's healing children??? Check it out:



Doesn't he look like one of those old faith healers...."send your money to me and feel my healing touch...." I don't know, it just looked a little off. Poor Kerry, those electoral vote tally maps don't look too encouraging. I sure hope whoever's running in 2008 has a little more personality than these 2.

I've got my free patterns page started, click KNITTING VIRGIN FREE PATTERNS to check them out. I wanna make them ALL. These don't even BEGIN to list all the goodies on my to-do list as a lot of my faves are on the Knitty website too! I had this cool artsy-fartsy button all ready to go, but saved it too small and screwed it up, so some hopefully cool upgrades to the old blog should also be up and running soon. Check out the list of blogrolled blogs I've got for some other good reads!

Major accomplishment of the day:
NOT eating any of the damn doughnuts in the break-room. They were calling my name....Christine, eat us, eat us ALL..... and I said NO! (yes I talk to food) Then they said, just lick off all the sugary glaze.....and I can't trust myself to walk in the room....
MUST fit into jeans again...MUST not get chunkier....I have to admit last time there was one of those awesome cake doughnuts with the sugar coating...and though I didn't eat the doughnut, I did lick off all the sugar.... part of why I'm doing the dreaded "duck walk" each am to get my pants to relax enough to be worn in public.

Fashionista

Yup, I'm officially stylin' today. Apparently the 2 months' vacation I took from eating sensibly and jogging 3 miles a day have taken their toll. I went from energetic & trim to chubby overnight. Must've been all those chocolate zingers...That or the closet ghosts in my house have conspired to shrink ALL my clothes so they are uncomfortable and look crappy on me. I do actually think I have closet ghosts. Someone or thing keeps leaving my sliding closet doors and the coat closet sliding doors open about an inch when I swear I've closed them. It could be my kids, but I prefer to think of it as proof that there's something shrinking my clothes.

I've now eaten sensibly (aka BORING) since Sunday and still feel like crap. I want INSTANT GRATIFICATION HERE. Why does it take 6 months to lose 12 pounds and 2 months to gain them back??? My other complaint is I KNOW I lost some of that poundage from my sad barely-A-cup chest and NONE of it came back there. Nope, my butt & thighs are getting pretty greedy.

SO, wearing a white stretchy shirt that just isn't quite stretchy enough today. Not quite a fashion faux paux on its own, but add the spaghetti stain from lunch (one sad little dot standing out in orange) to the diet coke splash across the lower right front side and I'm WORKING this thing baby.

Cripes. I need to put on an ankle bracelet and feather my hair and get a really bitchy look on my face to complete my transformation into Miss Hateful. SPEAKING of which, I KNOW it's a small office here in the dungeon, but HOW many freaking times do I need to run into her today??? I've had more than my quota of dirty looks, hateful sighs and having to walk past her to make up for the peaceful days off I had when I was home with my son. I bet she could make the devil himself shudder with one of her looks. I still smile wide each time as that seems to piss her off the most.

I'm going to walk for a mile tonight on the treadmill of hell and then reward myself with starting a new knitting project. Can't decide what to start. I think I'll start another little felted purse for an Xmas present.



I am working on adding a link to a bunch of free projects I want to start on, hope to have it up and running in a couple of days.

Knitty's Fall Surprise -- Breast Cancer Projects

The Knitty Fall Surprise is in. Click below to go to a special printable issue in pdf Adobe format with some new breast cancer awareness and other projects as well as a good cancer survivor story. They give good advice for fibers to use to make the finished projects as soft and comforting as possible as well as stylish and fun.

Knitty's Fall Surprise

After you click to download, make sure to give it some extra time. (Mine looked like blank pages for a few minutes before the entire thing was downloaded.)

Also, if you're a knitter, you NEED to check out Knitty's site. They publish a web newsletter full of GREAT articles, actually helpful tips and FABULOSO patterns FREE FREE FREE!

My weekend/my stash

Weekend update:

Rain Rain go away.... rain postponed the big outdoor Halloween festival to Sunday Afternoon, so the kids & I had a "basement campout." This consists of unfolding the couch, putting their indoor sleeping bags (blues clues & some princess or other) out with favorite animals all sitting along the edges of pillows. Lights go off, big camping flashlight/lantern goes on with an orange cloth over the top. Each little munchkin is given a bendy straw and a cup of mini marshmallows to stap with the straws (sticks) to roast over our campfire. We sing songs and sit on logs (upside down buckets) around the fire and finish the night by watching scooby doo movies while laying on sleeping bags. OK, so scooby doo videos don't go with outdoor camping, but THIS is my house baby. :) Got kiddos set, my cousin (supersitter) came over and mommacita went out to play some cards...

Went to Station Casino, and sat down at a rather quiet, mild table and was called over to Shaw's table (some nice asian guy who's become my little poker buddy and looks out for me and hardly ever takes my money) and we took over this table. He left early and I stayed until 2:30am and OWNED the table. It's a good thing I'm not in line to be a dictator, or I'd become the great ice-queen-bitch of the world. mwaa haa haaa...I was very polite, I took everyone's money with a smile, but it was amazing...everyone looked to me for the bets and raises and just assumed I'd win hands....POWER. I actually left with money (something I need to do more often) and ended up with $312 profit on the night even after paying for a full tank of gas.... woo hoo. When I grow up, I wanna play POKER...that one's probably not going over well with Grandpa Joe, so I'll go with the graduate degree, real job thing. LEARNED--> most poker players do NOT knit, so therefore, do NOT understand that a stash refers to YARN....when someone asked what I was going to do with all his money, I said "enhance my stash". I had to explain that I was not, in fact, a major drug dealer, just a yarn addict.

Sat. I admit I spent a few $$ on adding to the stash... I got more Noro yarns to make some felted party purses with a few modifications of my own for my sisters in laws and an aunt. Instead of doing the smart thing and going with boring yarn and making my own stripes of colors, I went for the GOOD stuff baby. So much for saving for my future and that of my children's. I didn't spend all the money, just a little more than I would have had I not cleaned up the night before.

Sat. night I realized I'm truly an OLD WOMAN now. I gave up free dinner, drinks, dancing and unbelievable sex with a young friend/flirty guy (10 yrs younger) one of those strange "fwp" (friends with priviledges) to hang out with Mark & Russell and eat & chat & look at pictures & catch up and go home early to knit....OMG where's the dance party chic??? Has she died??? she's still breathing, just buried deep. I actually didn't want to have to shave my legs and wanted to cuddle up on the couch with their little doggies on my lap and be mellow.

Sunday I organized my yarns into this old canvas sweater hanging shelves thing and realized I have entirely too much crap to have only been knitting for a few months. Also had too much fun and will take a pic as I'm very proud of my work. DORK I know it, but I love it.

LAST workplace update/bitch of the day (ok the last bitch I'll type anyway) is that we're all decorated for fall....I brought in an orange pumpkin full of mini Hersheys, and now the ladies bathroom (that we KNOW hasn't been cleaned in over 12 weeks) now is fall-colored as well. There is a lovely yellow/green stain on the floor all around the toilet...the old stains in the middle of the floor have now turned dark burgandy and when I couldn't take it any more and thought maybe I'd just lysol everything and at least use the toilet brush to swish it around, it had a FREAKING SPIDER WEB connecting it to the WALL. THEN I saw the brush itself, that used to be white, is now a mixture of dark orange shades. Forget driving along the east coast or to the ozark hills for the foliage, go visit the dungeon's LADIES ROOM. Someone PLEASE tell Miss Hateful to CLEAN THE DAMN PLACE! I'm going to have to start going to Mr. Goodcents to go potty in a public restroom vs the one here.

Back to Dungeonland

"I asked her why she never told us about the Ten Commandments & she said she wasn't ever that good with numbers so she loved everything as best she could & I remember thinking who needs all those rules anyway with a mother like her around."
--www.storypeople.com

My goal in life is to raise my children to be good and kind and fun and a bit irreverent and I just loved this storypeople story.

If you get a tight enough perm, she told me, it's almost as good as a face lift. But she had worked around a lot of toxic chemicals in the 60's, so I gave her the benefit of the doubt.
--www.storypeople.com

OK, I just liked that one!

SO, the dungeon goes on....

First of all, happy A, you look like a GODDESS! LOVING the hair!!!!!!! You are so dang stylish!

2ndly--the bosses can't understand why everyone's not all excited about dressing up on Friday and have low morale......this said 10 minutes after I heard staff talking about who was next to be fired.....hmmmmm can't figure this one out. My morale is actually at an all-time high...as now I just watch the chaos like I've got a front-row seat at a really bad reality show.

3rdly (is that really a word?) I actually brought up the fact that I'm a TAD BIT behind on my multiple duties and bossman just said, "really? you've got to get it done." I explained I could EITHER do this or that or that or that and he just smiled. I'm just an audience member who's now playing the part of the resident mental-patient here.

It's getting so crazy even my compadre's poker face flinched a little in disbelief and I about snorted with held-in laughter during a serious meeting. My stomach was making horrible noises due to holding in emotions...it's a dangerous thing. I was either going to cough, laugh out loud or get really gassy. I think there's now different levels of the dungeon similar to Dante's levels of hell in The Inferno. We've made it down to about level 5 and I'm hoping the end's in sight.

OK, this day is apparently NEVER going to end. 4 1/2 hours left.

Amanda and I went YARN SHOPPING today at lunch! She was laughing at me because I'm a total dork!!! It was like taking a pregnant mommy-to-be to find her first baby book.....OK, I AM a dork, but it was SO much fun....can't wait to spread this disease of knitting addiction!!!! She's taking a little class at the LYS, so once she gets the basic knit stitch shown the right way, I'll be there for any "oopsies" and to help her buy MORE MORE MORE yarn and get crazy like me. :)

Since I don't have ANYTHING going on in my life lately I decided to do this!


Yup, I'm going to write a novel in one month. I thought it sounded SO freaking cool. Content doesn't matter, the whole point is you get something written between Midnight Nov. 1st and Midnight Nov. 30th. There's a whole little project going that does this each Nov. and it's called NaNoWriMo, short for National Novel Writing Month. It's a kick. Maybe that will help me get these LONG-ASS entries shortened up here on the ol' blog if I get to write 50,000 words in a month????

Friday Friday Friday woo hoo

Story People story for today:

This is a poison soup to kill all the bad witches, she said. How can you tell the difference? I asked. O, good witches are very polite & say no thank you. Bad witches just die.

I'm in a Halloweeney mood today...taking the kids to the Leawood Park's Halloween bash from 6:30-8pm. They get to go trick-or-treating and jump in giant bouncy pumpkin things and go on a hayride on a bunch of smelly wet hay in the dark and eat cotton candy until they feel like barfing. MAN it's good to be a kid. Trick-or-Treating and IT'S NOT EVEN HALLOWEEN YET!!!

Gotta admit, I used my new felted purse last night and it was still damp! I couldn't even wait...AND I could have sold a TON of them if I were better prepared!! My son's teacher conferences were set up with a bunch of moms selling their home-business/craft/jewelry/crap and I had all these moms saying "WHERE did you get the FABULOUS purse?" Maybe next year...Xmas presents, here we come!!! I feel like felting something RIGHT NOW!

only 6 more hours till freedom....big bosses keep adding more responsibility and "you're so smart why don't you just do this...because we can't afford to pay the cheapest company we found $12,000 for it, YOU can do it..." Yup, gotta love this job.
I'm now a webmaster, an entire billing department, an analyst, database administrator and an administrative assistant (doing 1/2 the job of one of the fired ones from last week)...YUP, I'm now about 6 people and I don't even have a split personality yet...AND I get paid ENTRY level bottom-dweller-wages...A teacher working 9 months out of the year with all major vacations off and SICK LEAVE gets paid the same amount I make working every freaking day of the year except Christmas day....A webmaster that can't even fix her blog's html...should be an adventure.........yeah right....

Understand why the new LIFE PLANS are being worked on frantically???

OK, I'm stealing again!

OK, this one's AMAZING...StoryPeople I'm stealing the idea from Stephanie and it makes you feel all warm & fuzzy & "yeah, that says it exactly" when you roam around and read these little phrases and 3-sentence stories...I LOVE IT! Here's my new fave--> reminds me of that time of close-exhaustion after both kids are in bed snuggled up with their stuffed animals and mommo here has dropped on the couch for a quiet time...

There are lives I can imagine without children but none of them have the same laughter & noise.

Cool, huh?

Welcome to our blogging world!

OK, I found some great blogs out there and this one's a chic from Tennessee WITHOUT ANY YARN STORES NEAR HER!!! Can you imagine??? Poor baby! I actually go in to pet the yarn when I'm too poor to buy any, but want inspiration! I'm adding her to my links but wanted to put in a note here for you guys to see also! She's trying the sexy tank I wanted to make also. IF IF IF we can ever find yarn that will actually WORK for the dang thing, we can start a knit-along (and if I can figure out how to do that also) to create all these sexy-mamacita tops and TAKE OVER THE WORLD...ok, just go out and look hot maybe. ANYWAY, welcome to my new friend Nyxxie!

Nyxxie's Blog

Feeling better able to deal with the world now, and only 35 more minutes down in the dungeon...Gotta go to Joey's teacher's conference and then when the kids go to bed, I'm going to KNIT KNIT KNIT and drink me a glass of wine and have some peace and quiet!

Bad hair, bad makeup, bad body

I'm feeling very fat and ugly today. Ick. bad hair, thought my extra make-up was in the car but IT WASN'T, wearing the "is she pregnant or is she just fat?" sweater because everything else required ironing or washing or was TOO FREAKING TIGHT....FYI--"she" hasn't had sex for over 6 months, so it must be fat fat fat...I'm guessing the Good Lord above isn't going to mistake me for a mother-madonna-type so no worries of immaculate conception here.

At least I've got a cute purse! I'm the Fat Felting Queen of the World!



I realized the other night while eating my (swear to God) dinner of chocolate frosted zingers and peanut m&m's with diet coke (dinner ala Quick Trip) that MAYBE I'd better get back to eating healthier & exercising again to get rid of the stupid 12 pounds I gained in a LOT shorter time than it took me to recently LOSE the same dang pounds. Gonna start a boring blog documenting my new diet & exercise plan--> THE PANERA EATING PLAN...basically, I'm going to try to eat foods that are still recognizable as food elements. breads, soups, meat, veggies, fruit and cut down on zingers, oreos, and the like. Last winter I lost a ton just eating Panera's chicken chili soup (and extra bread). I've got NO willpower, so maybe if this works it could catch on...I know I'm not a big person and I hate when skinny little people whine about being fat, it's not that, I'm just getting chubby and can't wear my DAMN clothes any more and am TIRED of it!

I HAVE FELTED....and I'm HOOKED

OMG I finally FINALLY sewed my little party-purse's handles and bottom and ends and all that and ran it through the old washer a few times and I FREAKING LOVE LOVE LOVE it!! Here's before & after. I'm also working on a better link to show my projects while "on the needle" and through completion, so be patient and it should hopefully get better!

before & after:


I can't wait to get started on the boogey bag or sophie or something else FELTED!!!

Also got my act together and finished another red/orange fluffy scarf and am starting 2 more like my first scarf, but in other color schemes for the xmas parties. Here's the first 2:


Got the "easy" NOTICE THE QUOTES "easy" tank front done up to the point where I get to start decreasing but the pattern has NO directions for exactly how to do that, so I'm thinking I'll head to Knit Wits and see if one of the customers can show me how to proceed so I don't end up frogging any more of this thing:


And, this is quite possibly the strangest mix of yarns I ever saw in a $50 ball. It knitted up a strange thin scarf that actually looks kind of cool with a simple scoop-neck black top wrapped around the neck about 2-3 times:


For those of you following the work drama, it's stranger than ever, but I can't quite elaborate here yet. Just know that most of the day I had this look on my face like a fish out of water with my eyeballs bulging out and my mouth gaping open (really quite attractive if I do say so myself).

Why am I having so much fun?

OK, I guess I woke up on the obnoxious side of the bed today, as I'm just having a ball in this strange little land that is our workplace. Boss impressions are bad bad bad. Don't do them if you still want a job. Gotta remember that.

I think we need to have a reality show here. OMG we've got the villans, the crazies, the personality clashes, the tiny bits of hope being stomped to pieces, we've got it ALL baby. I already feel like I'm on survivor...no civilization, normal rules no longer apply, it's every woman for herself....we've got all the "alliances" the network show has, but the people voted out from here don't get to go on the Good Morning America show, they get to go to the unemployment office...

I don't know, it's such a silly day. There's no reason, but I can't stop cracking up. It's like I'm 13 yrs old at a slumber party at 4am and someone could say "dog" and I'd laugh until I snorted. Maybe the almighty Panera-bread-bakers put a little extra some-some in my french baguettes today. I know they have to know me as that obnoxious woman who ALWAYS asks for the extra bread (hey, it's free, it's good, and I'm a piggie).

A, I feel for you sista, hang in there with all the funk...maybe this will help on your fun adventure this afternoon...Seriously, you are an amazing woman and I'm glad you've become a part of my life.


OK, my boss just came in and I think he called me a mushroom and laughed. I have a light burnt out above the desk (God forbid we spend money on an electrician--so we'll be "customizing" the wiring down here--how have we not burnt to a crisp yet?), so I'm going for a lounge effect with my sinatra & harry connick music and trying to not notice the 45 files of PAPER PAPER PAPER on my desk....if I stacked them up high enough, maybe no one would notice if I were still here?

I just stole 2 pens from the girl's desk who was so unceremoniously booted out of here last Friday. How much of a vulture does that make me? What is the appropriate mourning period before you can start scavenging for better office products from those voted off the island (ok dungeon)?

Midnight blogging

OK, it's midnight. I haven't knit a thing. I haven't gotten any homework done on my last class. I HAVE had too much fun reading reading reading all these blogs. Working on my blogroll, but it's pretty boring. I'm setting some new goals:

#1 --> Knit an actual sweater or tank top and WEAR it, being the ultimate sexy chic in knits (or at least feel that way)

#2 --> Get into grad school, get out of the dungeon

#3 --> Work on the blog format, get more attitude and less fluff

#4 --> Write an entry that doesn't take 15 minutes to read

#5 --> Battle the urge to eat EVERYTHING in this house

#6 --> Felt the damn party purse I knit, just have to sew the straps and wash wash wash it

Things I've learned in the Dungeon

SO, another week starts down here. This week I have no more "sick little boy" excuses, got to be here all week long. It's a good thing that Joey's feeling better, but I am still glad that if he had to get sick, it happened at the biggest stress-week we had lately so I got out of the line of fire for now.

Well, by observing the strange little environment down here I learned a thing or two...

#1--> If your bosses are suddenly concerned for you working too hard and find "help" and you get to train them to "ease your load" start looking for a job FAST. There's no such thing as free help in the dungeon, you're just training the poor chick getting stuck with your duties before they escort you out the door.

#2--> Don't bring more personal items down to the dungeon than you can comfortably carry in one trip. Watching a poor guy carrying about an apartment's worth of furniture, star wars dolls (or are they "action figures" once you're a grown man?) and other stuff up & down the stairs while we're all working is not a good thing. (I got pissy a couple of weeks ago and took every personal thing out of here so none of the bad kharma would touch my pictures of kids or other personal doo=hickey's I'd amassed down here so I'm good to go at a moment's notice).

#3--> The ones who wouldn't mind being laid off and get unemployment (I even volunteered) are the ones the dungeon-masters will hold onto until the bitter end. The ones who desperately need the job are those that are booted out the door.

#4--> Companies with less than 50 employess are not eligible for Family Medical Leave Act or any of the other government regulations that make sure employees are treated fairly and legally. It just doesn't matter.

#5--> It is JUST A JOB. It cannot define who you are. I do my job, I leave and go home. Once I reach sunlight again, I leave the crap behind me (or is it below me?) and get on with my life. It's just sad to see those who this place has broken...

A little bit o' politics

I stole this from Stephanie. You've GOT to go and see her post on the crazy soap lady a few days back. I almost wet myself laughing so hard...Click on her name & go back to Tues, Oct. 12 for the funniest story...

I went knit shopping oh oh oh oh oh

SO, first of all, Joey update...> The medicine I was stomping around the house about and all that seems to be actually working. YEAH! He still tires very easily, but ate a ton today, played a ton and was pretty much a regular, obnoxious boy again, which is always a good sign of health! He still isn't quite over his infections, but it's a step in the right direction.

LONG-ASS couple of weeks! SO, to reward myself (and it's payday on Monday also) I went shopping! I thought I would be smart and NOT go into the LYS to save my $$, and found a few deals elsewhere too!

First, a couple of weeks ago I bought 3 balls of Gedifra Costa Rica. I made a scarf out of this to donate to the school auction for my daughter. It looks strange, but works up as THE most softest scarf you've ever touched. It's going to be an Xmas present but I might have to make one for me too!


Went to Michael's craft store for some black plastic canvas (working on little candy-corn tiny baskets for Halloween parties) and found this Lion Brand Incredible ribbon yarn. I remembered a cute free pattern for a ribbon tank top, but they only had 2 balls of the City Lights color here, so I figured I could make a long thin accent scarf out of it....(I know, scarves, scarves, scarves, but I've got to make about a dozen before Xmas!)


Then I took a bunch of paperbacks to the Half Price Books store to sell, and made enough to get Beth, Joey and momma-cita each a book...but since momma-cita was the one with the $$, I got 2 books and the kiddo's each got one. Joey picked out a box of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles coloring books and Beth got a cool kit with a book & supplies for making friendship bracelets. I might just have to make some for myself! Here's my goodies:


Camp-out update...> We had SO much freaking fun at the Brownie/5th grade scout campout. I can't even begin other than to say that one of the other moms and I realized we not only went to daycamp at Timberlake, camped with our troops at Prairie Schooner (where we camped last night) but also went every summer to Oakledge at about the same time for our 2 week camps! ALL these memories came out as we talked and laughed and had a BLAST!

Best part of the night wasn't when the girls were learning songs around the campfire, hiking in the dark with flashlights, bonding with the moms, no no no. Best part was when one of the moms (my old gs pal) got up and threatened the girls that the next one to make a sound was going to sleep outside by herself in the dirt...and it worked! I know, that sounds so terrible now, but when you're tired & grumpy and they won't quit screaming/saying "shut up I want to go to sleep...she's touching me..." and on and on, and then there's complete silence, it's a good thing.

Between that and one of the poor moms is absolutely terrified of spiders....and out of ALL of the sleeping bags, the big hairy spooky tarrantula-looking wolf spider jumps down onto HER bag right before she climbed in...I didn't think we'd ever get her to sleep. Part-way through the night I turned over and my hair brushed against my arm and I jumped, saw a dark spot on my bag and yelled and smacked it, then realized oops, that was part of the bag, I don't think she slept the rest of the night. I told her "false alarm" I always yell in my sleep, but she wasn't buying it. I actually slept like a baby, toasty with my warm bag pulled up to my ears.

FYI, I don't think the 5th grade leaders will be inviting us along any time in the future. The two main leaders were like green versions of Hitler with boobs. They were not pleased that we were still packing everything up at 8am and the girls were just outdoors playing follow-the-leader and not performing organized skits and official girl scout songs. I swear these women were entirely too precise with their girls marching and singing in perfect little lines coming over the hill. I guess when we shrugged and said "so?" it was not the proper response. Ah well, we'll survive. Our 2nd grade little rich mommas were tougher than I gave them credit for and we had a blast even without Hitlerette 1 and 2 instructing us in the almighty Girl Scout Law.

The Bitch is Back, Baby!

SO, here's me! I'm back. Down in the dungeon, feeling sassy, rarin' to go. NOT looking forward to freezing my lilly-white BUTT off tonight with the brownie scout troop, but ah well. Those little 7yr olds will either decide the outdoors is entirely too cold and will never want to camp again, or they will be strong little ladies that can triumph over any obstacle....yeah, we'll probably never camp again.

Joey update, the kid's feeling better, not much in the way of ideas on treating the current infection other than a weaker antibiotic that may or may not work. We'll give it a try for 3 weeks then go in for more testing and see. He's back at his little pre-school today and was quite the king of the ball...imagine a child of mine loving attention.....how would that work? He's feeling better and that's what counts I guess.

OK--I missed a lot of the debate last night, but read the transcripts and heard all the tidbits in the am shows, but the world needs THESE political debates below...... make sure your voume is up and click away. I would suggest you NOT click the "share with friends" link as it opens up pop-up hell. Copy & paste from the webpage once you open the songs....Click the links for a little toe-tappin, political singin from those that would rule our country...

Political Bohemian Rhapsody

The Presidential Horror Show

Have I really not posted since last week?

WOW, well, lets see...my son's sinus surgery went well, but there were a few icky things that came of it. For newer readers, my son Joey (shown below with his uncle Mike) has cystic fibrosis (CF) and has been a very healthy little guy for his first 4 1/2 years. Basically, it's a genetic disease that affects his lungs & digestion as well as his sinuses. It pretty much sucks. We raise $$ each year in the big CF walk in May and I'll have a link to donate to "TEAM JOEY" added later to the site. In my links is the official CF site with more info. They are close at finding not quite a cure, but some good meds to help these people live normal, healthy lives long into their adult-hood.

Joey was a trooper and went under at Children's Mercy in KC (we are SO lucky to have them right here!) with the best ENT surgeon who is also a mom and has the best kid-side manner as well as being good at her stuff. He had more polyps and infection than they thought, and more tissue & gunk was removed than originally planned. He recovered fine, stayed one night and went home Sat. The people at work (I know I bitch about most of them, but this was pretty sweet) sent a big-ass cookie bouquet and he was all excited. I was proud of myself for not eating his cookies, as I've apparently dealt with the stress that is my life by EATING everything in site until I almost barf and knitting. (often at the same time)

The only prob is the stuff they removed cultured 3 infections. One is not a big deal, the 2nd one is a mildly bad thing that should also respond well to antibiotic treatment, but the 3rd is a bad sucker. Not the really bad cf one, but it's one level down from this thing that hits CF kids and does bad things to their lungs and is very antibiotic-resistant. The good surgeon was on vacation after the procedure, so I've gotten to deal with the one who talks down to mothers, thinks we have no business asking questions or, heaven forbid, questioning their prescribing a weaker antibiotic that my son has already built an immunity to and that since he's been on it since JUNE and we had to have the surgery to get rid of the infection as well as other stuff, MAYBE that wasn't the right plan??? (I was VERY diplomatic when discussing things, really). Let's just say I didn't have a very good time the last few nights while listening to my little guy struggle to breathe without coughing up a lung.

SO, I sat and cried a bit when I should have been sleeping, OK, salt has to be cleansing for the face and all those zits that are now here as my body's craving for chocolate has reached an all-time half-bag-of-oreos-at-a-sitting level has brought out!!! I started reading all the knitting blogs that I follow as well as a few friends' as well. I didn't feel like typing myself, but I had a good time, had a few chuckles and ended up going to bed without eating any candy. OK, there's none actually left in the house, but I wasn't craving it either. :)

SO, long story (do I tell any others, sorry!) ending here. My son's better, we're working with someone in his CF clinic and the GOOD surgeon tomorrow to find a good system of meds to get rid of the bad stuff before it gets to the scary level and he's already feeling better and running around like a regular obnoxious boy again (just can't breathe well or sleep good at night yet)! I'm all inspired and had FUN reading my little blog friends, catching up on what's happening and what great things people are making and I knit the crap out of the "easy tank" and a new scarf to boot. I'm ready to start shaping my first armhole and I'm too excited. I've really GOT to get a life! I'll add pics soon.

This may sound tacky, but if your son has to be sick with a cruddy thing, how great is it that it happens at the same time as the big bosses are in town and things are at an all-time stressful level in the dungeon??? bwaa haa haa....evil, I know, but MAN he couldn't have picked a better time. I really REALLY may have more time on my hands soon, but at least I got out of a lot of not-fun meetings and today my little half-day (while Joey went to work with Grandpa in the am) happened to be the day the not-so-happy-person didn't make it in to the office.....JACKPOT! Don't worry, Miss Hateful was in rare form and stomped around the door to my office and complained about things that were my fault just out of my direct area, but you know, I just smiled and smiled......OH, and the icky, nasty floors in the bathroom and kitchen still have the same stains PLUS more.....wonder if we'll benefit from any more emails from Miss H?

I swear I'm going to stop typing now, thanks for all the happy thoughts everyone sent!

My daughter's first over-night camp-out is this Thursday night and it's supposed to be in the 30's!!!! Of course I used to be little miss girl scout, princess of all the outdoors, but now I'm an old, cold lady who's going to freeze her BUTT off and pee in a frozen outhouse in the dark.....THEN get up and go to work in the cold dungeon...

MUST STOP TYPING................................

A few pics Completed poncho & more goodies

Here's the poncho modeled by my daughter, the lovely Elizabeth, 7 1/2 yrs old. I did NOT take the picture, so I take no blame in cutting off the top of her head here!


This is my son Joey with his uncle Mike (my baby bro). Joey about died that they were wearing similar shirts, too cute!


Elizabeth in cheer gear for her first venture in cheerleading:


And I swear, you always need a dose of big hair.....the glory days....when I could wear a mini and dance all night! BF Jildo in the pink and I'm in the blue & white stripes. We might come back home about 4am stinking, falling down drunk looking like heck, but by goodness, that hair was STILL big!

SCORE!! Free Gift Time!

"A change in the weather is enough to renew the world and ourselves."
--Marcel Proust

It's such a pretty fall day outside, slightly rainy and cool and would be SO great for laying on the couch under a quilt reading or knitting by the fire or doing just about anything other than working your life away in the dungeon with the crazies...

Things overheard this morning from fellow dungeon-mates...
"It's keeping me sane..." --from one of the craziest
"la la la la-la la la......" THE FREAKING LIMBO SONG being sung over & over by our chatty one...HOW does HappyChic stay so happy up there??? I'm afraid I'd result to slamming a printer on her head after the 3rd verse of limbo limbo la la's
"how many martini's did I have last night?" --on the phone from a cutie who apparently has a much more exciting life than I do
"but the gun wasn't loaded ALL the time" --not even going to explain that one

THE TRUE SCORE--> Any other Lancome shoppers out there need to get themselves to the Jones Store as the free gift is going on NOW. The bag is about butt ugly, but it's filled with the BEST stuff this time!! I went in on Sunday for the Elizabeth Arden free bag (a CUTE pink leather-look handbag with wrist bracelet-holder thing full of crappy makeup) and needed foundation. The little barbie doll behind the Lancome counter (but a nice doll--I HATE snotty little barbie doll girls) told me to take some samples of the foundation, pay for the full sized then, and I could pick it up starting Oct. 6th and then get the free gift. BUT she gave me the foundation as well as the samples. I didn't think anything of it, put it in the bag with the EA goodies and went home. Stopped by the Jones Store last night, picked up my bag o' necessaries and when I got in the car, realized whoever packed the bag gave me ANOTHER foundation! woo hoo! $38.71 of covering my 35 yr old 5-zit covered face for FREE! I know, I know a "GOOD" person would have gone in. BUT I'm not so good. hee hee hee. I do actually tell people about mistakes at banks (I was a teller too long and they make your life HELL for $.50 let alone $38.71) or somewhere that someone would get in trouble for the error, but I'm LOVING my extra goody today!!

Another Knitting Quiz & a school on fire

Is this a bad omen of the big bosses coming to town next week or what? My horoscope today talked about how I should believe my intuition when I think I may have worn out my welcome? I may have a whole lot more time on my hands soon. That wouldn't be entirely bad either.

So first of all, here's the quiz:

What kind of yarn are you?

The first time I took the quiz I turned out as Novelty Eyelash and the 2nd time I was Mohair. Kind of fun. I think the shallow part of the description fits, but as it says, I don't really care. :) I'm also warm & fuzzy with Mohair's descript, so maybe I'm a warm & fuzzy shallow bitch.


You are Novelty Eyelash. You are very of the moment, hip, and happening. You are often seen wrapped around someone's neck. Some see you as too flashy and ultimately shallow, but you are having too much fun to notice.

OK, does this picture creep anyone else out? I can understand the idea of it, as most people sleep better with someone to cuddle with, but Shit the Bed! I'd freak out if I woke up in the middle of the night with someone's hand next to my head. I guess they're all the rage in Asia. CREEPY.


I'm packing for my son's trip to the hospital (he's having his sinuses worked on and they're trying to patch up some of the spots that are giving him nosebleeds too) and I'm taking the easy tank and a new skinnier version of my friend Jildo's scarf along. I started it with only 15 stitches and it's just the plain old garter stitch, which works out so pretty & bumpy & funky on those Schaeffer yarns! I think I'll make it long long long & skinny so I can wrap it around my neck a few times. In the burgandy hand-died mix, should be cute! I also am packing micro-wave popcorn, granola bars & diet cokes for momma to munch on while the little guy is resting.

Joey's pre-school's roof caught fire yesterday. Yesterday was such a freaky day I don't want to go into too many details about work. Let's just say it was the kind of day that when I received the call that "there's no danger to the kids, but the school may or may not be on fire" it didn't even phase me. I thought "ok then, lets go". Turned out part of the roof caught fire, but workers on the new extension being built saw it and called it in before it caused too much damage or even set off the fire alarms in the school. The munchkins were all out on the playground until their folks could pick them up. The kids were having a blast watching all the firemen and trucks. I think I saw the hubby of one of the ladies that quit here for a better job, but all those damn men look alike with their big heavy coats & boots & muscles & short hair cuts, yummy! I waved at them all just to be safe. :) I am pretty sure I saw him as one of the fire-fighter-women I recognized from his dept. when she gave my daughter's preschool a tour of their station.

Quiz of the day

All right, that's pretty optimistic, but after seeing this one on a bunch of blogs, (sorry I can't credit where I saw them as I wasn't paying attention), I think we need some quizzes!!!

What Kind of Knitting Needles Are You?

I'm retro pink aluminum:
You are pink aluminum. Retro, straightforward and fun, you love classic things. If they're 99 cents at Goodwill all the better! You are moved by striking colors and tasty morsels, and you like a stitch-n-bitch session in the sun. Just remember, while you're being kitschy cool, don't get too cold. Ice cubes are best kept in your cocktails, baby!

Beautiful weekend!

OK, I'm all "shiny, happy people" feeling today. Back at work, no Miss H. :) It's made a huge difference in the general attitude of the entire place. It's amazing how infectious evil attitudes can be. By general consensus, work has gone back to "The Dungeon" as "The Underworld" sounds too much like a bad mythological story.

Did nothing, went nowhere this weekend AGAIN except for kid stuff, knitting and cleaning. Woo Hoo the life I live, man the excitement is barely containable. Actually, I really enjoyed the break, which is scary.

I knitted my heart out, started a thinner scarf out of the same Schaeffer yarn I made Jildo's scarf for myself, got 9" done on the easy tank (done in green heathery yarn) and couldn't bring myself to frog any of the sexy tank start. I just keep trying to convince myself it will work, but I think I'm going to have to face reality and start over. It is just such small stitches on thin needles and had so much time invested.

Watching tv Sat night as When Harry Met Sally came on. Damn Meg Ryan, last weekend I watched You've Got Mail and ended up all melancholy and weepy. I cried my damn eyes out at the end of this one too. I'm basically happy with my life until those DAMN movies come on. Why don't I meet an extremely wealthy, sensitive, sexy, funny man who looks like a movie star walking down the street?? Yeah right. I'd get tired of him in a couple of months anyway. Changed channels to HGTV, saw some organizational show, got motivated and redid my piles of crap in one closet and a dresser. Felt much better about the world. NO more Sat. night Meg Ryan movies. I was smart enough not to watch Cast Away the other night, I cried for hours after that one when I saw it. Heck, I cry at oreo commercials, so that's not that big of a deal.

My kids now officially have better social lives than I do. This weekend was birthday party central. MAN you can only take so much of being in those kid-heaven-parent-hell kind of places! Kaleidoscope at Crown Center was pretty cool, the kids had a blast and it wasn't too stressfull until we all walked across to the food court for bday cake...the kids just took off running and turned a corner and were GONE. Thank God my munchkins stopped at the end of the hall and didn't follow the rest of the little 5yr old psychos. Two of the moms didn't even look for their kids once we all got caught up and got the little monsters back going the right direction. I said, "um, I don't see your son..." and she was like "oh, he'll figure it out, we shop down here all the time." Another mom looked at me with the OMG expression, I took her son with my kids and she went and found the little guy, who was taking apart the train in the expensive train store (not the toy store) that you weren't supposed to touch. He was on a whole other level of the mall. Cripes. Good guardian angels or something.

Afternoon at Bump City, a LOUD hyped-up version of a gymnastic place with cool stuff and the kids had a blast. Sunday we went to Jeepers which I believe is Chuck-E-Cheese on Crack. They have the obnoxious loud games, tickets you have to carry around, stupid prizes your kids will sell your soul for AND indoor roller-coasters, bumper cars, train, and other rides as well as really really bad pizza. We survived pretty well on not too much out-of-pocket extra $$ and Joey & I each hit a ticket jackpot and we got 3 big ol' inflated toys, scooby doo, wolverine and a dolphin. We looked like we were stumbling home from the fair...lugging all this crap home. They had a blast, and I survived, so that's what matters.

The Underworld

I no longer spend 41 hours of my week in the dungeon. Nope, now I spend that eternity (I swear it feels like 82 hours) in the UNDERWORLD..............The Dungeon just didn't do it justice. That could be a dank, dark, smelly place. THIS is a dank, dark, smelly place that is also a strange little alternate universe and the crazies are fighting out who's in charge. I think it's Dante's 14th level of hell and the scary thing is we drive here of our own free will and climb the stairs down to our personal torture chamber, knowing that scary, strange things will happen and people will send emails about ladies behaving when we are on "our cycles." You know, it's bad enough we can't get our paychecks until the DAY AFTER we are supposed to. We get paid the day AFTER the 15th and the day AFTER the 1st. They couldn't even hand out the paychecks at the end of the day on the real payday. nope. SO at least we get them when we get in to the office at 8:15am. NOT TODAY. The controller is out fishing, and we're waiting for the boss-man to come and hand out our sad little reward for surviving another 2 weeks. What, do we have to beg for the little $$ we get now????? OK, I know I'm too pissy about little details, but this is getting ridiculous. It's the point of the matter. I'm going in in half an hour and suggesting that he give us our MONEY please. I hate it when boss-man give out the paychecks becuase he stands there until you say "thank you sir, may I have another" just like in a monty python movie or bad fraternity prank where you keep getting paddled on the ass with a big ol' board but can't stop asking for more or being polite or they beat the crap out of you.....AAARRRGGHH

I'm REALLY REALLY PISSY today (no, really). I think it's spending that half hour in Miss Hateful's chair yesterday. The evil kharma soaked through my jeans and infected my butt. Stay out of my way and don't piss me off. THEN she came in to make up the time she lost yesterday, so I got to start my day off right with her stomping into my office and sharing her special rude manner demanding some detail or other. I nicely explained her boss asked me to start on the work she left behind and she said "FINE" and stormed out, slamming her hand on my door with a BANG. Yup, just how a bride-to-be should be acting the day before her special day. Share the love. I wanna be home with my kids and my knitting and thinking happy thoughts.

I'm going to have to become a web comic artist. Of course, I can't draw, is that a problem? Seriously, I believe if I could illustrate some of the craziness it would help vent through my system. Maybe I'd better wait until I'm not financially dependent on surviving in the Underworld.

I just know I'm going to get myself fired. The big bosses are coming to town in a week, so I might have a LOT more time on my hands. I could do unemployment. Do you still get unemployment if you get fired for blogging???

Stranded Republican Video

Just one more political entry here...

Here's a link to a pretty cute video ad for the Stranded Republican. I got a kick out of it.

http://www.moveonpac.org/10weeks/?id=3910-3956209-znD4cLIZk.0dZs4lFCfo5g

Amanda and I had a little political discussion on Iraq, Korea, Africa and other such topics this am. Very cool, yet slightly odd since we normally discuss very important items such as shoes, shoes, shoes, men, clubs, friends and the like. See what watching a political debate can do to you??? I'm so excited for Amanda as it's her first presidential election! She was in Europe for the first election when she came of age so this is the big one!

And did anyone else notice that both wives were wearing the same freaking outfit???? I think their collars were different, but other than that they looked like little bobbsy-twins! Doesn't someone call to verify that???? Although Mrs. Bush's hair did look much better.

Damn Knitted Tank

OK, I can't decide....if I stretch the start I have so far, it might work. Maybe I can quit eating so dang many oreos and do more crunches...and it might work....I CAN'T STAND THIS!!!! I have that Kinks song stuck in my head....Should I stay or should I go now???? I think I'm going to keep knitting and I can always frog it later, DAMMIT!

Here's me this afternoon...

debate debate debate yadda yadda yadda

MAN, I'm trying so hard to be open minded, but I'm tired of hearing GW say the same dang thing over and over and over and over. I have to give the man credit, he speaks well and shows emotion and is pretty charismatic (compared to Kerry, not compared to a normal human) but OMG find something new to say! If I hear "uncertainty" one more time I might SCREAM again. PLEASE. Oh God, it's apparently catching as now Kerry is doing the same comments over and over and over.

OK, the really important part of this debate is that surely Ms. Heinz-Kerry can afford a hairstylist, can't she????? For the love of all that is holy, get that mop under control! Can I take a donation of products to send her way? Just say no to frizz.

I think I'm going to have to start watching the Daily Show again. I can't take the boring flat news any more...

SCREAMMMMMM OK, the wonderful (PERFECT FOR THE GAUGE) sexy tank is NOT working up big enough. I've got 5" of ribbing and it's supposed to be 16" across and it's not even that with a major stretch. I thought, maybe it will still work, but when I hold it up to me it won't cover the chubby belly. DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT

Bathroom update (come on, you know you're dying to hear more potty-time talk) so Miss Hateful's daughter hurt her ankle and she had to leave work early this afternoon. Her daughter is a sweet kid and I hope she's ok. BUT, now I guess the ickies will go on until I go insane and bring the rubber gloves & toilet cleaner & mop to work! OK, we think we figured out who left the nasties on the toilet and it is not surprising. The chick is nuts. I heard my old assistant saying Miss Hateful was saying something about me to her boss and Miss Grumpy (the ex-librarian) and I thought she was saying I was the one rubbing my butt all over the floor like a dang dog doing circles on the carpet and I was going to get a little pissy. Turns out Miss H. was just bitching about me with the regular complaints. Good thing as I just want it noted for the record that I use toilet paper for God's sake.

One other obnoxious thing happened this afternoon. In order to finish the work Miss Hateful left, I had to go work on her computer and sit in her throne. My assistant was joking about how much friendlier Miss H. looked now. ha ha ha. THEN the local boss came out and said, Christine, you look good in that chair....maybe we should think about a switch. Little man, you don't wanna go there. I have about 3 ounces of patience left and that is cutting it dangerously low.

SO while I'm trying to do a 15 minute little job, the newer chic was just talking on and on and on and on about strange things. I almost felt sorry for Miss H and Miss G. to have to work with her all the time. I mean it was like having Dustin Hoffman from Rainman sitting there on her little heating pad......HEATING PAD for CRAMPS....anyone anyone...??? She's nuts. Instead of getting some little detail off the Ford website for her report, she went on and on about how she was going to pretend to be a college student and call them to ask the question and then she could pretend to be a car designer and then and then and then I swear to GOD I almost punctured my eardrums with paperclips........She's like a really tall rainman...I left at 5:05 (TOTALLY out of character for me, normally I hit the door at 5:01 at a dead run) and she was sitting on her little heating pad STILL talking and NO ONE was there....creepy.

Tired of reading??? I'm tired of typing. I'm trying to get the guts to pull out my ribbing...maybe I'll leave it on the needle since it looks so darn pretty and just pick up a larger pair and try again.....DAMMIT

Comments Changed

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

OK, I love the new comments by Haloscan, but in putting the new one in, ALL my comments were lost. :( But, the good news is now ANYONE can post on this blog instead of just blogger members.

The bathroom saga continues....

It seems Miss Hateful was not happy about being asked to clean the bathroom. She DOES get paid for cleaning duties on top of her regular pay, so it's not like anyone's asking for any work outside her little job description or anything. So we ladies in the local office receive quite possibly the most inappropriate office email I've ever seen. Here's the text:

Subject line: "No self-cleaning fixtures here"

"I have been nominated to inform everyone of the problem we have been having in the ladies room. It seems that while some of us are on our cycle, we don't seem to notice the mess we leave behind. Please be aware of this and take extra precaution to clean up your own messes. I have heard complaints on the toilet seat, visible waste in the trash, and it doesn't much effort to flush an extra time."

I will say I am ALWAYS a 2 flusher if it is necessary. Our toilet is so dirty I almost cleaned the darn thing myself just to feel better. HHHmmmmm wonder why we've had a bug infestation in there and in the kitchen.....hhhmmmmm I guess mopping the floor IS a good idea. The trash has always been put in the trashcan, it's not like anyone's being nasty, bathrooms just need to be CLEANED for God's sake.

I don't know why, but that just made me laugh. I almost had to go use the nasty facilities myself. Good thing I'm not "on my cycle" now, or I might have had to take "extra precautions". OK, so I'm a dork, but it's funny. Just CLEAN the damn BATHROOM and GET OVER YOURSELF.

Today I'm feeling a bit..

OK, so I'm half knitting and half watching the news and the big lead-in was about a naked bank robber in Tennessee. They said he was only wearing socks....then they say after he entered naked and wandered around for a while, he pulls out a handgun....Is it just me or is anyone else wondering just WHERE he pulled the gun out of???

Working on the sexy tank top, and it's actually starting to resemble a sweater-to-be. I've got 3" of the back ribbing started and it's taking FOREVER since it's 6 stitches to the inch. I am using the tangliest yarn on the face of the earth. It's easy to knit with, but just becomes this horrible mess of knots...UGH. It's Trendsetter Yarn IGUANA in this strange mix of orange/blue/green/ I can't describe it, it sounds horrible, but looks really cool.

YEAH for me, I pulled enough out of the sale baskets at Knit Wits to make the tank and scarf and only paid $6.50/ball. They were still full priced at the Yarn Shop for $12 each. WOO HOO. :)

OH, the nicest thing happened at the Yarn Shop last Sat. I was in picking up MORE of the fluffy stuff I was using to make the donation scarf, and I was looking (ok petting) a selection of yarn and admiring this GREAT scarf a mother made for her teen-age daughter. She brought it in as she hadn't knitted in years, and forgot how to cast off. I was the "experienced one" scary, huh? and showed her how to do it and she saw I was looking at the few balls left. After deciding NOT to spend more money than I had and not get it, she came up and asked if I was going to get the last 2 balls if I would like the ball & a half she had leftover. She was going to just bring it in to give it to me. Wasn't that sweet??? I was good and suggested she use it to teach her teenage daughter to knit with and she could use it to make a matching scarf for one of her friends.

OK, I can't help it, POOR MARTHA!!! Here's her home for the next few months...They call it Camp Cupcake....


I'm addicted to Panera.....gotta have a muffin....and an iced green tea...I think there's liquid crack in there or something, I just GOTTA have one!

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I stumbled on the funniest little drawings:
www.toothpastefordinner.com